Re: -=Dark_Angel=- & The Canon Episcopi by Bachus	8-Aug-02/4:23 PM
Could you possibly correct the following confusing mistake I made: "a purely private, therapeutic poem was posted against your wishes" should be "a purely private, therapeutic poem wasn't posted against your wishes". I would be much obliged, Sir.
Re: 2-12-01 by kthulah	8-Aug-02/5:50 AM
This is dandy.
Re: Joe likes "DYNAMITE"! by horus8	7-Aug-02/7:44 PM
Tsk tsk. This is horus8's birthday surprise, is it? A non-musical version of an already almost too exciting, freely available song... (or should I call it "track" as all us underground DJs do?) Anyway I have a sort of problem with people using names in poems. It always seems to me that using a name in a poem is one of the most smug and lame things you can do. Viz my poem 'A leak in reality'. I should have just said 'his'. Like that FUCKING OFFSPRING SONG 'blah blah blah' (that's not what its' called probably) where it's like "17 shannon is pregnant"...wow, you've really said a lot there by saying that she was called "shannon". It makes it more true and real. To be honest I don't think that's what's going on here. Blah blah I suppose to win your admiration and the replacement of any 'grin's in my name with an 'a' all I have to do is say this poem is great I loved it wow damn good but actually I didn't. I mean there's interesting imagery and then there's just bollocks. Banshees have nothing to do with staying up or drinking mountain dew voodoos all week or .
Re: AT AMSTERDAM STATION FOR FIRST TIME by kawakurdi	7-Aug-02/12:04 PM
I think you'll find that most people in Amsterdam are fairly fluent in English. If you like playing such a self-indulgent game, why not just do it in the U.S.A.? Just stick your tongue into your lower lip and tilt your head a bit when you do it.
Re: Regrets, No More by writteninskin	6-Aug-02/11:06 PM
In particular, "no more does distraction kill me/as I search for love, descending/deeper into sinful dreamings" can easily be read both ways, especially combined with "I have known love from deceivers/but true love's meant for true believers", and your defense of the needy feeling.
Re: Regrets, No More by writteninskin	6-Aug-02/11:03 PM
While earlier you said "there's nothing wrong with wanting to feel needed and loved". Which one is it?"
Re: Lonely by DevilTmptrss	6-Aug-02/10:56 PM
What's the theme here...loneliness? If your aim is to clumsily insinuate that having sex only temporarily removes loneliness, then I suppose you're succeeded. But the moral of the story was so obvious from the start, and so overclimactically stated, that you might as well have left out the last 90% of the poem.
Re: Existence by ThoughtfulSoul	6-Aug-02/10:51 PM
ThoughtfulSoul, can you not see the difference between a) being arrogant and b) saying something is shit? Have you ever said something was shit? Did it make your head go up your ass? If not, then realise that criticism does not equal childishness. If so, I suggest you make an appointment with your proctologist, Sir.
Re: Regrets, No More by writteninskin	6-Aug-02/10:39 PM
Who said there was anything wrong with it? It's just that glamourising it doesn't seem to be very useful or poetic. It's part of the failing of humans that sometimes they get into a state where they rely on one person for happiness, and while this may be an interesting subject to write poetry about, your poem seems to be simply saying that such a state exists, in a fairly obvious way. Moreover you seem to be glad that you are in this state, and while this gladness may be a fundamental feature of the state, and therefore necessarily included in any poem which is written from the viewpoint of someone in the state, all the gladness seems to add is an impression of surrender and weakness. All I'm saying is this: if I had written a poem about being in this state, I would have at least made some reference to the fact that it's an inherently displeasing state when one neutrally observes it - it seems clearly unpleasant to be reliant on someone else for happiness; since you didn't, I wonder what you're trying to achieve.
Re: Regrets, No More by writteninskin	6-Aug-02/8:57 PM
So...what are you saying? That you feel uncomfortable unless there's someone that you know approves of you? An exciting sentiment indeede, Sir.
Re: How I Wish by DevilTmptrss	6-Aug-02/8:53 PM
Allow me to summarize. Verse 1: I miss you. Verse 2: You're insecure. Verse 3: I have limited skill at empathy. Verse 4: Some pseudo-mystical bullcrap. Well that was certainly worthy of poetry.
Re: Unsaid by Revekka	6-Aug-02/8:51 PM
Luckily, I am not afflicted by any such silence. What a load of total BS. You're just imagining that there was any such tension because it makes your life more angsty.
Re: AIDS in a Glass by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	6-Aug-02/4:37 PM
Poetie. At 11:24 you were concerned that I might offend some unknown person whose family has been afflicted by the AIDS. By 11:26 someone in your own family had been afflicted with the AIDS. Now, either more than one person is using the 'Poetie' poemranker account, which is a crime so heinous you ought to be banned immediately, or you are simply talking bollocks. You felt that by pretending to have an AIDS sufferer in your family you could turn your mere conceited moral outrage into personal grief and sympathy. I presume you've already emailed the site owner to demand my permanent exclusion, on the grounds that at least seven of your close friends and family members have died of the AIDS in the last week, with two more due soon. Also, you will have contracted chronic diarrhoea and trapped wind, which will provide you more reasons to insincerely accuse of personal attacks. As for the poeme itself (which, along with Van, constitute my as yet unfinished 'AIDS in a(n) X' trilogy), I thought it raised some particularly thought-provoking points. For instance, you might like to consider, and write some preliminary notes on, the following essay questions: 1. Why did the poete choose a Van and a Glass? Compare and contrast these two AIDS-containing items. 2. Can AIDS really be contained in a glass? And if so, would this provide a method of infecting someone with AIDS without having it yourself? 3. Can AIDS be extracted anally? Would this provide a possible industry for many African countries?
Re: God's Rod (toilet drink poem) by horus8	6-Aug-02/1:38 PM
I can't tell if you were just stoned off your face when you wrote this, or if you spent ages writing it and filling it with ancient symbolism. Because it makes no fucking sense to me, and looks like the sort of stuff I write when I'm stoned. It's probably the former. forloner, boner, where's the dog?a
Re: My ode to "the artist" by Agemo-Z	6-Aug-02/4:39 AM
He only changed his name to escape the commercial ensnarement of his previous name by his record company. Just like I changed my name by Deed Poll to -=Dark_Angel=-. I may have to change it again though, now the FBI is on my trail. Thanks Poetie! Oh, and this poem isn't really an Ode, is it? It's a haiku.
Re: I Hate You by mytenderrage	5-Aug-02/7:58 PM
It's really "sad" the way so many people on this site resort to saying "-=Dark_Angel=-'s poetry is crap, therefore his criticisms stem solely from jealousy of your wonderful talent." Can't you see I'm NOT TRYING TO WRITE THE SAME SORT OF POETRY AS RAVEN18? Why would I be jealous of someone who didn't have anything I wanted? I criticise raven18's poetry because it's trying to be meaningful (or whatever), and it fails. Miserably. You may criticise my poetry, but you don't mention in what respect it is lacking. You just vaguely insinuate that it's substandard, in a smug, knowing sort of way. Which is what I would expect from most people, since the default reaction on reading a poeme about something that is "childish" or "insensitive" or "crude" is to tell themselves that it's awful, because their brains would explode if they abandoned for one moment their constant desperate attitude of trying to have the same opinions as everyone else. What standards, exactly, does -=Dark_Angel=-'s poetry not meet? (And don't say something obvious and crap like "maturity, for one. Sensitivity, for another". Those are bullshit standards.)
Re: Black liqourice & G-stringed orphans by horus8	5-Aug-02/1:19 PM
Thanks for letting me do the voice of Leon Spencer in Sniper.w
Re: Chicken by robert blake	5-Aug-02/9:11 AM
A good try!
Re: Black liqourice & G-stringed orphans by horus8	5-Aug-02/9:11 AM
A good try!
Re: You are the Rain by emilyowey	5-Aug-02/9:04 AM
A good try!