Re: COCK by Stephen Robins	Ranger 86.131.59.63	30-Jun-06/12:38 AM
Sounds pretty legendary to me.
Re: COCK by Stephen Robins	Dovina 17.255.240.6	29-Jun-06/11:18 AM
You withered old has-been inadequate die-hard.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	Dovina 17.255.240.6	29-Jun-06/11:13 AM
Well dang! I was at the public library using my laptop there and the wireless. Now I'm at the Mac Store and Chat works fine. It's good to be back and to see that you too have not abandoned this place, albeit I see no new poems from you. Hang in or hang it - that is the question. Happy to see you hanging.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	ALChemy 71.75.188.128	29-Jun-06/11:00 AM
I just click the word "chat". Dang we were expecting you too. We were quite disappointed. She has all kinds of gossip for you. I very happy to see you back by the way. PS. Stop disappearing for weeks at a time dangit. This place ain't the same without you.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	Dovina 205.184.71.11	29-Jun-06/9:44 AM
How do you rascals connect to Chat? I can't make the dang thing work.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	amanda_dcosta 202.164.137.209	29-Jun-06/8:48 AM
Thank you CRL. I honestly didn't think my poem was that good. It's very encouraging to note your critique and vote. Thank you once again.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	amanda_dcosta 202.164.137.209	29-Jun-06/8:28 AM
Yeah, it's good to have you back. And now, am looking forward to your poems which are long overdue. :-)
Re: A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	CherokeeRoseLoggins 71.31.231.183	29-Jun-06/4:32 AM
An excellent write. Good construction and rhyme. A godo concept that those in war would understand and know the depths of emotions and feeling here. Excellent write. (Thumbs Up)
Re: watch by the indign	CherokeeRoseLoggins 71.31.231.183	29-Jun-06/12:07 AM
A very good write. Good construction, and rhyme. Needs some captializing on a few words, otherwise, an excellent write.
Re: Doctoring Stigmata by thepinkbunnyofdoom	CherokeeRoseLoggins 71.31.231.183	29-Jun-06/12:02 AM
A good poetry prose, and a good concept. The construction and verse is very well done.
Re: a comment on Late Break by MacFrantic	MacFrantic 71.208.115.199	28-Jun-06/7:33 PM
I rather liked 'deconstruct,' as it lent itself well to the structure. Thank you very much.
Re: Late Break by MacFrantic	Ranger 81.152.176.220	28-Jun-06/2:29 PM
Other than 'deconstruct' this is excellent. Very tidy indeed.
Re: Lovers east of the Coombe by Caducus	Ranger 81.152.176.220	28-Jun-06/2:22 PM
Great use of the limerick format for something beautiful. I think Dovina's got a point regarding the logic in here - the bough itself doesn't blow away. You could easily get round it by making that line refer to the leaves, perhaps "A bough's gold bloom". This is pretty damn gorgeous though.
Re: a comment on Money Back by drnick	Ranger 81.152.176.220	28-Jun-06/2:14 PM
Yeah, I think quite a lot of the old guard have moved on, but a few of us are still about. I've finished for the year, and am home over the summer - killing myself working and not having time to write despite promising myself I'd set some aside. Quite honestly I've had the most boring couple of months imaginable...maybe I should have gone to Michigan instead of Cardiff, by the sound of things. A bit more of a trek to America though. I have got a couple of poems waiting to be submitted; they need a bit of an edit and some proper time before I can bring myself to inflict them on you all though.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	Dovina 12.72.37.9	28-Jun-06/9:49 AM
Bicycling on Vancouver Island, Canada, and the San Juan Islands, Washington, was tough and beautiful, like a good man. Two women on bicycles, packing everything, caused somewhat of a stir among the natives. But we accomplished it, and such deeds benefit the world as much as poetry. The scariest part was the Holy-Crap-It’s-A-Logging-Truck road from Lake Cowchan to Port Renfrew, where a man was mauled by a bear the week before we went. Good to be back.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	amanda_dcosta 202.164.136.50	28-Jun-06/5:52 AM
Thanks Dovina... and good to see you back after your long absence from PR. How did your biking trip go? Must have had a swell time. As for the details of the issues of war that I have tried to note down, well, I must agree that I aught to edit that a bit. Maybe I aught to give more emphasis on the baby's needs... must admit that.
Re: a comment on Lovers east of the Coombe by Caducus	Caducus 86.141.200.125	28-Jun-06/1:51 AM
A bough abloom from autumns tomb - they are staring at the birth of seasons from the tomb of seasons - the ground of leaves and spines. Autumn only really makes its point in the last line, first the clearing of blossom and then the tomb of leaves on her tomb. Her autumn was in the woon (dwelling) where sadly they never got chance to dwell (a bit like blossom)
Re: Memories of modernism by madamefrufru	Dovina 70.38.78.229	27-Jun-06/5:54 PM
Leaving me wondering whether it's a painting or a crash is this poem's greatest value. It leans toward a painting, but leaves just enough holes in that view to make me ask whether you are understating something more. I'd like to see it lean the other way.
Re: Lovers east of the Coombe by Caducus	Dovina 70.38.78.229	27-Jun-06/4:45 PM
Could call it a limerick, except that most of those are light, insulting, or funny. This isn't. The blooming bough from Autumn's tomb escapes me; and how is a bough blown away except in strong wind. Maybe the crabtree of verse 3 could work in here. But is that a Crab tree? You bring the Autumn back, why not the tree? The last two lines are great.
Re: a comment on A Little War Victim by amanda_dcosta	Dovina 70.38.78.229	27-Jun-06/4:30 PM
It would have to be an Arab name, unless I totally misunderstand. She probably knows her name and wants to hear it spoken from familiar lips. Thoughts of her mother or other close kin are probably on her mind more than philosophy. I'd concentrate on her hunger, discomfort, and lonliness, letting the broader issues of war be infered by the reader.