Re: Captured by Dovina	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	12-Feb-07/8:42 AM
Dovina I have just soiled my brand new spats.
Re: a days journey by donmiguel1960	Bethy 165.154.46.24	12-Feb-07/6:58 AM
I love the word "befuddled" its how I wake up some days...usually when I can't find clean socks, or my agenda...either or...it is a real feeling... Bethy:)
Re: Ode to a Pimple-Lyric Spawned by Phalkon's Greasy Face. by SupremeDreamer	Bethy 165.154.46.24	12-Feb-07/6:53 AM
My vote...I wish to be very very dead; I love this...simple serious... Bethy :)
Re: Captured by Dovina	Bethy 165.154.46.24	12-Feb-07/6:46 AM
Short of sounding like a Coke or Pepsi add, There's Nothing Like The Real Thing Baby! lol, Good Good Good !!! Bethy:)
Re: Celui by half.italian	Bethy 165.154.46.24	12-Feb-07/6:39 AM
sexy...good memory... :) Bethy
Re: A Tragic Love Tryst In The Park Near The Sewage Works by Edna Sweetlove	Shuushin 65.175.177.241	11-Feb-07/9:19 PM
more drivel - well crafted, but really - why bother. it's like gold-plating dog shit.
Re: Let's praise great Britannia's golden days of now and then by Edna Sweetlove	Shuushin 65.175.177.241	11-Feb-07/9:18 PM
blah - who cares about this nationalistic shite.
Re: a comment on Sir Magnedrol vs. The Dragon (part 1) by Phalkon	Phalkon 70.246.86.30	11-Feb-07/12:27 PM
actually, i got the highest grade in the class. i know, i know. i pity the rest of the graduates, as well
Re: a comment on self-suffocation by Phalkon	Phalkon 70.246.86.30	11-Feb-07/12:25 PM
ouchies. i have been slammed and thusly know when to quit. but just out of curiosity, why do you prowl this place only to tell people they'll never be as good of a writer as yourself?
Re: Fuck Shelters, & fuck OutReach Court. by SupremeDreamer	half.italian 76.172.249.205	11-Feb-07/10:39 AM
yikes.
Re: Celui by half.italian	half.italian 76.172.249.205	11-Feb-07/10:27 AM
Have at it.
Re: Ode to a Pimple-Lyric Spawned by Phalkon's Greasy Face. by SupremeDreamer	half.italian 76.172.249.205	11-Feb-07/10:27 AM
Dog shit.
Re: a days journey by donmiguel1960	half.italian 76.172.249.205	11-Feb-07/10:24 AM
Mournful sounds awkward to me positioned as it is. 'furthermost' sounded awkward to me as well, I didn't even think it was a word. I was wrong. Try restructiing lines to eliminateg 90% of the "my"'s, and you'll be much happier with it I think.
Re: a comment on Captured by Dovina	Dovina 12.72.36.72	11-Feb-07/5:41 AM
Soft-handed men will do, I suppose, and sex toys serve other purposes. Perhaps the title is misleading; my finger is not so much swallowed as captured.
Re: a comment on Captured by Dovina	Dovina 12.72.36.72	11-Feb-07/5:38 AM
Good call on the extraneous "a."
Re: a comment on Ode to a Pimple-Lyric Spawned by Phalkon's Greasy Face. by SupremeDreamer	xxx 67.172.190.253	10-Feb-07/4:49 PM
'so much so' reads a little better as rhythm perhaps, but you are far better at poetry than I. I can but bow.
Re: Ode to a Pimple-Lyric Spawned by Phalkon's Greasy Face. by SupremeDreamer	SupremeDreamer 130.65.109.104	10-Feb-07/4:06 PM
Just a question concerning the verse, would any one agree that it would be better if I changed it from "so much that I now wish to be very very dead;" to "so much so, that now I wish to be very very dead;" ? Opinions everyone?
Re: a comment on AIDS Bonanza! by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 63.212.164.89	10-Feb-07/3:11 PM
A pathetic attempt to save face.
Re: a comment on self-suffocation by Phalkon	SupremeDreamer 130.65.109.104	10-Feb-07/2:41 PM
Or there's also option three: Stay under the bed crying about it till some girl finds you there and offers pity sex. Unfortunately, most likely your mother will arrive in time to comfort you and thwart further possibility of procreation. A pity indeed.
Re: a comment on self-suffocation by Phalkon	SupremeDreamer 130.65.109.104	10-Feb-07/2:33 PM
Sonny boy, I'd have no problem walking straight up to your face, appalling you with my rather foul breath, to inform you in a violent manner how much of a little shit you are. And then, if you wished to take it further, I'd decisively finish it with swift action, by brutally beating you in the face. You can come down to San Jose if you'd like and prowl the downtown area for me, like a dunce; or you can engage me intellectually on this site by raising the bar of your sad writing abilities and use it to thrash me. Either choice makes little difference to me kid. I don't reside in some cozy dorm, giving voice to pathetic despair like some meek child. My matress is concrete, my bedchamber open to the air, my resolve not in anyway crippled by fear. So, do me a favor, don't make stupid insinuations that you'd punk me if you had me face to face, in a banal comment online. Such things tend to attest to your cowardice, not mine.