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self-suffocation (Lyric) by Phalkon stuck inside my own head
no way to break free
i scream 'til my lungs implode
no one listens...
i'm screaming a tune that no one hears
i'm falling apart, drowning in tears
i can't hold my grip
my head begins to rip
i turn myself inside out
and look at myself in the sunlight
the bright burns my eyes
my eyes too dry to cry
i'm screaming a tune that no one hears
i'm falling apart, drowning in tears
i can't hold my grip
my head begins to rip
i tendons tear apart
i feel my beating heart
i can see my muscles ache
i feel about to break
i'm screaming a tune that no one hears
i'm falling apart, drowning in tears
i can't hold my grip
my head begins to rip
i'm screaming a tune that no one hears
i'm falling apart, drowning in tears
i can't hold my grip
my head begins to rip
(the whispering begins...
(i know it's that time again...
(the light begins to fade...
(and everything's still the same...)
i'm screaming a tune that no one hears
i'm falling apart, drowning in tears
i can't hold my grip
my head begins to rip
Down the ladder:
For Sharon too
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 0.6666667
Posted: February 8, 2007 10:36 AM PST; Last modified: February 8, 2007 10:36 AM PSTWeighted score: 4.483454 Overall Rank: 12850 Comments:
and your English teacher just laughed. :(
And you never actually answered SupremeDreamer's (valid) question: what are you talking about when you say 'i tendons tear apart'?
at the risk of receiving further emotional suffering, i admit that line was a typo and should've read "my tendons tear apart".
i would edit the poem, but i would lose all my previous votes. >_> 125 view(s)
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Eh? What in holy fuck is with the I? Is it a disease? Did you somehow fool yourself into thinking it was necessary, like you convinced yourself that sharing this pimple-lyric to the world was a brilliant undertaking?
Allow me to compact this whole thing, though I can not preserve its claim to being a lyric in the process:
Silly emotions have flooded my hormone filled head
so much that I now wish to be very very dead;
but my grip on the .36 is slipping due to my tears,
hampering my attempt to fill my cranium with lead--
so instead, I'll wail till blood comes out y'ears
in the form of a bad lyric you'll wish y'never read.
Not bad eh? In fact, I think I'll post this. Oh, and heres a resounding zero. Do us all a favor, smoke some weed, and find something that inspires better creativity... OK? Or slit your wrists, you know, whatever works.
man... and to think, i haven't posted anything on here in years! i see it's still filled with the same people who think they really knoew the difference between art and trash.
i'm sorry i've ever doubted any of you. i'll go crawl under my bed while you continue to blast my musings with slams you'd probably never have the balls to say to anyone in real life :)
But seriously, do you want to know why this has been slammed?
You can come down to San Jose if you'd like and prowl the downtown area for me, like a dunce; or you can engage me intellectually on this site by raising the bar of your sad writing abilities and use it to thrash me.
Either choice makes little difference to me kid. I don't reside in some cozy dorm, giving voice to pathetic despair like some meek child. My matress is concrete, my bedchamber open to the air, my resolve not in anyway crippled by fear. So, do me a favor, don't make stupid insinuations that you'd punk me if you had me face to face, in a banal comment online.
Such things tend to attest to your cowardice, not mine.
Stay under the bed crying about it till some girl finds you there and offers pity sex. Unfortunately, most likely your mother will arrive in time to comfort you and thwart further possibility of procreation.
A pity indeed.
but just out of curiosity, why do you prowl this place only to tell people they'll never be as good of a writer as yourself?
Like I said before, and try actually reading what I'm saying:
You can sit there and be a lowly crustacean in the throes of your
embrowning, resigned to the foul poopdeck of RankerVille...
OR
You can start actually attempting to write something with skill and consideration, rather than spewing emotionally crippled, teenaged puke, and embarrassing yourself.
Who knows, maybe if you actually tried to write better, you'd be better than me.
Except that the attitude & stupidity you're emanating tends to give one the impression that, you don't posses the spine or determination to do anything well; it seems that you'd rather settle for mediocre dribble. Pity, isn't it?
But I do claim to be engaged in a continued effort to improve and stengthen my abilities, in the hopes of becoming a writer of a "professional" and skilled sort.
You happen to be displacing your own thoughts as mine, when it's actually your insecurity forming dejected conclusions within your subconcious. [In other words, stop putting words in my mouth. It's much more effective to quote the things I actually do say, rather than coming up with your own reinterpretations.]