donmiguel1960
on some deleted poem
21 Jun 2004, 8:47 PM
Like the emotion,
A painful way to live. You really need to quit now, I can't add everything you write to my favorites. on second thought, keep writing. Do you mind if I print a few of yours out?
Giving is everything. Read 'I Will Stay' by NoSage. that is my opinion. And yes, it is the truest form of happiness, charity. I have never felt better than when I can be of service to someone in need, and I thank God for giving me the skills necessary to help many people.
I love the way you say "As I woke on berth of linen" without an indefinite article, though that would be the obvious and correct thing to do.
Can someone tell me what is the present tense of 'wrought'?
For some reason I kept picturing the Holy Spirit. You say you have never written before? what a way to start!
In my opinion, this is the least Fiona-Apple-like of your poems. I mean that as a compliment.
PS-I'll give you five dollars if you can come up with a better response than 'Thanks!'
I don't think you've really thought out the line "There are rivers to cross between happiness and loss" very well.
PS-I thought the movie 'What Dreams May Come' was totally ace!
Yea, we've got a few of those poor fellows here in Colorado Springs too. Sucks to be a statue.
Welcome to poem ranker. nice work, kinda nice to see some good poetry from a newby, I really enjoyed this one.
Ok, I dig this one..and extra points for being from Tennessee. ;0)
So true. Well done.
For this to be a lyric, I'd like to see a more well defined chorus (I know you don't have to have one, but I like choruses). Otherwise, pretty good.
Busted. Reminds me of a time not too many years ago. I was probably looking for something else tho'.
Not bad, but can't necessarily see it as a lyric. *8*
Almost had it for a street performer... Statue!? Oh!
*heh* *9.166666666666666666666666666666667*
It would seem that you have a solid foundation. Enjoy .
So much to imbibe, I fear I must read this one several times. great work.
Wonderful!
Really