Re: All You Need Is Gloves by -=DIABETES=-	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.116	23-Apr-05/11:29 PM
No glove, no love. This needs some sex. I mean good, hard, 30 minute(because the hooker charges by the hour and it took about 25 minutes to get there) sex. Seriously though, "manufacturer", just doesn't work with how I'm reading this. Not to mention the fact that I was a little bored, and hoping either more lewd, or better writing from a -=_=-, even minus the _.
Re: Prickly Pear by Dovina	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.116	23-Apr-05/11:45 PM
Simple, but good. Athough you description of the defense is a little lite for my taste. It's a struggle for life, via conservative nature. If this isn't about a Cactus(at least somewhat), sorry for being stupid. <3 Jason
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 204.250.12.246	24-Apr-05/3:55 AM
Omit "so" in line 7, "and I" in line 9, and "go" in line 12. Maybe scratch the last line. Otherwise good.
Re: This one the love by thepinkbunnyofdoom	Dovina 204.250.12.246	24-Apr-05/4:00 AM
Many have fought the concept of love and ended up loveless or love torn or unlovable. Love always wins, somewhere else maybe, but it always wins. Bow down to it.
Re: All You Need Is Gloves by -=DIABETES=-	Goad 80.132.205.98	24-Apr-05/8:30 AM
It should be "all you need ARE gloves", and "gloves ARE all you need". Apart from that, it's kind of catchy. In fact, I could even imagine it being set to some kind of pop tune and working as a lyric.
Re: Escapism by vulcan	cpill 81.179.110.224	24-Apr-05/1:27 PM
poor bastard
Re: For Katrina by BiggRobb	cpill 81.179.110.224	24-Apr-05/1:43 PM
Constantly, never acting Hiding I, can, never, get, courage? Even if I find it, I won’t know how to use it So inexperienced eats behind crowds I lag, they move everyday, more, more I want time Reminded all of you How to deal? I can't look in your face. I walk behind won't speak, The words come you leave why won't I chance Another missed? Constantly...
Re: Arab Shepherd (a belief poem for Dovina) by zodiac	fevriere 62.254.128.4	24-Apr-05/3:27 PM
I like it and despite having a pick, can't find or accord with any faults pointed out thus far. It's a good poem, worthy of a good handful of reads, which is rare; it does have a Frostian quality to it, I'm sure. Observant narrative, conclusive moral. And the twas. :)
regarding some deleted poem...	fevriere 62.254.128.4	24-Apr-05/3:29 PM
You have to retract something, I believe.. Would love to see a bit of punctuation in this. I sometimes write narrative poems out like prose to get the grammar (full stops, commas) right, then add the line breaks where they naturally fall. No vote as I don't think you're done with it.
Re: Antique by Billy Fights	fevriere 62.254.128.4	24-Apr-05/3:34 PM
What's a morningstar? Is it one of those little choppy throwable disc things with spikes? I must confess, the first stanza made me want to puke but the fourth I really liked (and the second was ok too - I'm just lost on the morningstar). Weird, eh?
regarding some deleted poem...	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.116	24-Apr-05/5:15 PM
I believe it's petted(second to last line). Otherwise, this is more free verse than a prose poem. -8-
Re: Disable by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	Caducus 172.203.166.88	25-Apr-05/4:04 AM
you crack me up
Re: Good King Brownceslas by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	Caducus 172.203.166.88	25-Apr-05/4:05 AM
at last a real xmas song. Jesu would be proud of his darkest angel.
Re: A greater purpose? by Damien	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	25-Apr-05/6:15 AM
Awesome.
Re: All You Need Is Gloves by -=DIABETES=-	edpeterson 68.79.19.7	25-Apr-05/6:35 AM
can i have gloves custom fitted to accomodate my massive pinky ring? I think the scale should have halfs. I really want to vote this a 1.5, but i can't :.(..
Re: Self Conscious by Damien	fevriere 62.254.128.4	25-Apr-05/9:09 AM
It's a bit naked. Creation of or from sensation?
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 204.250.12.246	25-Apr-05/9:17 AM
"from"? in the first line. "every"? hue in the second line. I'm sacreligious, I know.
Re: Self Conscious by Damien	Dovina 204.250.12.246	25-Apr-05/11:05 AM
Frankly, I think you've gone downhill. Your early poems showed a unique, though debatably inadequate style. Then, after much ridicule, you turned another way - not as good, in my opinion, as what you can make of your original stuff. that original style is workable, I think, but needs refinement, which is the hard part. Receiving inspiration is easy; developing craft is not.
regarding some deleted poem...	sliver 207.200.116.130	25-Apr-05/1:45 PM
CAn he brew me a cure for gout? This sucks. How's it been goin, Old man?
Re: Self Conscious by Damien	zodiac 212.118.19.216	25-Apr-05/11:19 PM
No one is saying your assumptions aren't new. They're about as new as making up a language with only vowels or wearing a slightly-altered hat for trousers. Why didn't you just say "true" instead?