sliver
on some deleted poem
19 Dec 2005, 12:37 AM
perhaps a skin graft would help?
Beautifully written. i wonder who these jerks are who gave you a zero. Heartless, sadists!
Your originality is refreshing in this world of mediocrity.
Beautifully worded.
Sliver, do your best
and God will do the rest.
Keep up the good work. (10)
Proof that you don't have to use 50-syllable words to write a good poem. Reminds me of an old George Jones song... Yabbadabba Doo! The King is gone and so are you..." -10-
You sing? a clear idea portrayed. Good.
And yes, we are all of the same race. whether purple, green or orange.
Tao Te Ching
http://www.wam.umd.edu/~stwright/rel/tao
spiritually speaking u have it dead right.
I really have to strain to see the light......
Which direction is it coming from?
Very sad, forcefuly told.
Great description.
Provocative and very elegant in the 2nd verse. I dont think that this is the best poetry I have read from you, but it conducts a better more interesting experience in a clear manner. If there were anything to improve, perhaps the 1st and second verses could be enrichened in terms of language e.g. geneticists say -> geneticists exclaim in their gatherings, maybe thats not too good, but hopefully you will see what I am driving at.
Nice prose.
I don't know what this is, except that it should probably be called a prose poem, not free verse. Could be a drug trip, or some trauma, an illness. Whatever it is, the human contact at the end is good.
I don't see why absolute silence is required, unless the absurd amount of whiskey is a very small amount.
I liked the imagery, And I actually pictured hoarfrost in the first stanza.
Why the morbidity? It was going so well.