Re: A HANGMAN'S MOANING by Dhanesh M Kumar	richa 81.178.217.160	5-Mar-06/1:36 PM
'Alas doing for the sake of bread' is garbled. Something like 'hanging men for the bread on my table' makes more sense. 'The justice perhaps may'- No 'the' perhaps and maybe mean the same thing (in this context) so you should ditch one. 'Justice may have a thousand reasons' would be more obvious. 'to make him stranglehold' should be 'to strangle him' and the man does not surmount the knot. The knot is atop him. A mind can not realistically be said to be brittle because it is non-material. 'agonized faces many I have seen' should probably be 'I have seen many agonising faces'.
Re: Pelted with stones on the common by Bobjim	xXxDemonicAngelxXx 152.163.100.6	5-Mar-06/6:23 PM
I think it's a really good poem. I didn't really like the line 'I'd rather be eaten by sharks.' I don't know, that line just didn't really flow to me. But it was a great poem over all.
Re: A HANGMAN'S MOANING by Dhanesh M Kumar	Caducus 172.143.151.6	6-Mar-06/4:02 AM
Intersting concept and not badly penned.
Re: A Failed Proposition Under The Night Sky by Ranger	Bobjim 84.9.184.25	6-Mar-06/8:07 AM
Guess you don't need to complain about the lack of comments anymore. :D
Re: The King Of Loserville by mindsigns	lmp 141.154.134.3	6-Mar-06/9:14 AM
not sure how to vote yet (still cogitating), but aptly titled.
Re: The Ocean by Fayt	ALChemy 24.74.100.11	6-Mar-06/9:19 AM
Unless the ocean's name is "Sweet" I suggest losing the possesive form. While your at it change "Sweet" to something else. The ocean's not sweet it's salty. What's with all the caps in the first line.
regarding some deleted poem...	lmp 141.154.134.3	6-Mar-06/9:23 AM
for some reason i am reminded of the odd "spam poetry" that i get in my email sometimes. that is to say, neither good nor bad.
Re: happy, but cautious by hendrimike	ecargo 167.219.88.140	6-Mar-06/9:41 AM
Some nice details: "in the summer when the dusk calls you to dinner/and dogs go swimming in lakes swallowing sunsets." First couple of lines are awkward, esp. "shifting breeze that feels good to be near.
Re: goddess of the harvest by calliope	ecargo 167.219.88.140	6-Mar-06/9:45 AM
Very odd.
Re: The Final Night by xXxDemonicAngelxXx	ecargo 167.219.88.140	6-Mar-06/9:49 AM
Would make a decent lyric.
Re: The King Of Loserville by mindsigns	ecargo 167.219.88.140	6-Mar-06/9:53 AM
Figure out a way to kill three quarters of the "I"s and this'll get a lot better.
regarding some deleted poem...	Fayt 141.157.35.222	6-Mar-06/10:15 AM
Very creative imo!
Re: my girl's day [tri-ku] by lmp	Fayt 141.157.35.222	6-Mar-06/10:39 AM
pleasent to read.
Re: Existential questions by kawakurdi	Fayt 141.157.35.222	6-Mar-06/10:42 AM
o so true...
Re: Portals to you by Caducus	Ranger 62.252.32.15	6-Mar-06/10:58 AM
Nice, I'm tempted to suggest that you get rid of 'are' at the end of each opening line, maybe keep in in stanza 3 (at the start of line 2). Other than that, very pleasant!
Re: The King Of Loserville by mindsigns	Ranger 62.252.32.15	6-Mar-06/11:00 AM
'Some think I should get laid' would fit better.
Re: The Bait by Dhanesh M Kumar	Ranger 62.252.32.15	6-Mar-06/11:04 AM
Personally I'd replace 'smooch' with something else, and 'The holder often/enthralls with proud/while...' doesn't make sense - perhaps 'enthralled with pride', or something like that. Other than that, not bad.
Re: my girl's day [tri-ku] by lmp	Ranger 62.252.32.15	6-Mar-06/11:07 AM
Nice enough, although as you'd emphasised morning and evening, I'd like to see the second haiku have a 'midday' theme, just to complete the set. It would also give you scope to put a little more imagery in the second one; in comparison with the others it is lacking somewhat at the moment.
Re: The Ocean by Fayt	Ranger 62.252.32.15	6-Mar-06/11:09 AM
I hate to say it but you're a syllable over. Change 'water' to 'spray', perhaps, that would fix it.
Re: Seawards by ecargo	Ranger 62.252.32.15	6-Mar-06/11:11 AM
This absolutely raced past - with the exception of the last line, did you mean for it to slow down there?