MercedezDream
on Daddy's Little Girl by some deleted user
13 Oct 2003, 5:47 AM
This poem is EXCELLENT. I cried when I read it. Everything just flows together. I give it a 10!
Tears...perfect 10!
[_] AABB rhyming scheme
[_] About drugs
[X] About romantic love
[_] About writing
[X] About suicide or self-mutilation
[_] About the author's social pastimes
[_] Arbitrary indentation
[X] Arbitrary line breaks
[_] Autobiographical but written in the third person
[_] Clerical errors
[X] Clichéd imagery (gazing out of window, tears falling like rain)
[X] Clichéd rhymes (love/above, heart/apart)
[_] Clichéd angst words (putrid, wretched)
[_] Devoid of rhyme
[X] Devoid of other linguistic embellishments (alliteration, onomatopoeia)
[_] Devoid of other literary devices (simile, synaesthesia)
[X] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery
[_] Ellipses used overabundantly
[_] Insipidly whimsical or zany
[_] Internet shorthand or emoticons
[_] Leaving rant
[_] Lower case only
[_] 'Lyrics'
[X] Melodramatic
[_] Naively religious or superstitious
[_] Obsessed with femininity
[_] Pointedly unanswered questions
[_] Rage against the machine
[X] Repetition of a word or phrase to the point of nausea
[_] Sanctimonious
[_] Self-obsessed
[X] Sentimental
[X] Smugly-named protagonist
[_] Thesaurophilia
[_] Untitled
[X] Vicarious wish fulfilment
-12-
heh - cute. I was just about to give up, cuz the endrhymes are, well - like they are.
Then you have this awesome ending; good job.
Tight.
clever. Capitalize turkey.
ha ha ha, don't mention it.
MEDIOCRITY CODE: B16040F1
please no more blue 0s if you do not like my work then be brave enough to say so. that is all i ask. have a good day ^_^
Still not back but I had a strong urge to write something to be thought about.
mead and head--no.
indeed. what inspired said muck?
"ÙØ¬Ùاد Ø§ÙØ¥Ø³ÙاÙ
Ù Ù٠بÙ"????
no way!!!
?-Dave_Mysterious-?
on Ù
صادر ÙÙØ³Ø·ÙÙÙØ© Ø£Ù Ø§ÙØ§ØØªÙا٠by Wobble McFly
13 Oct 2003, 1:08 PM
I bet this doesn't even mean anything.
A Sandnigger pigeon taking out my radiator.
This is charming.
pimple
Superlative and well crafted.
Also