i think you can do better than to mix the quaintness of the inversions with straight subject/verb/object.

poems are not a good medium for political views... at least in my humble opinion...

what happened to 5-7-5? 4-7-6 is new to me...

please don't use IM language in poetry... "ur" made me cringe

Zodiac, you are such a nitwit. Zoetrope is Francis Ford Coppolas (you probably have no idea who he is) on-line workshop for screenplays, flash fiction, poetry, flash fiction on and on. And as a matter of fact you smug child, I have been published several times, ever heard of NFG? didn't think so. grow up stop being such a little arse. And you are a fool if you don't think agents freqent these sites, obviously you are not a serious writer, just a poser.

this souns like something you wrote while on drugs.

blah blah blah

to long

beautiful and sad.

I like swollen and welling together.

velevt. must needs add spellcheckerthingamyisthing. :/ I like "bonsai'd mountains" but don't see how it really fits. I want that in a poem all its own. I like the image and feeling overall, though. Oddly, tumefying did not mean at all what I was guessing it would.

i have to go to a work-related activity right now, but i will be back. richa--think metaphors for nature. think parallel structures. think 'as above, so below' and all that that implies, structurally.

make your topography mine? Is that from the geographer's book of seduction.

I think you are experimenting with line breaks here. I think the sentences need to be shorter (or perhaps you have just missed out some of the punctuation). As it stands this rambles a bit.

Good God Lydia, I know you lean towards the right, but giving this -10- is taking things a little far!

has a very sweet, if cryptic, feel. I'd like to see it formatted slightly different, but the content is fine.

8 - 2 - 3? For some reason, I thought haikus were 5 - 7 - 5...

So... what are your rules for haiku?

Is this haiku? I have no idea anymore. 'Haiku' is just a word.

metahaiku (Meta-Ku) by ex0teric One, two, three, four, five Now you must count to seven Then the first, again Metametahaiku (Meta-Ku) by -=Dark_Angel=- Haikus are easy. A first-class dunce could write one About writing one. This is Bad (Free verse) by newagepoet2000 This is bad haiku Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad Very very bad i love this shit (Haiku) by Yatasuma I write haikus be- Cause they are easy, only take 30 seconds Can we all agree the Meta-Ku is tapped out? Yes, we can.