| regarding some deleted poem... |
1-Jan-04/7:49 AM |
killed me with the first line.
dead.
But I kept on reading in case it was poetic satire of some type, like some kind of storking large black wolf zombie - trapped forever as a creature of the night.
Now I hang from a bony-fingered tree like a vampire bat and hand you an "L".
I think you could make a good story from it, though.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
1-Jan-04/7:52 AM |
loose lips ... are fun at parties.
what is it a picture of? I will build you a snowman while the image forms in my tired head.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
1-Jan-04/3:00 PM |
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"ending a bloodline" has to go.
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| Re: A stitch by EAger to Offend |
2-Jan-04/6:28 PM |
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some conjuringing? a curse? Have a snowman; eat his nose.
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| Re: Haikus for Nentwined by horus8 |
3-Jan-04/6:10 AM |
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a ten in the hopes we may be blessed with his holy presence.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
4-Jan-04/7:26 PM |
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some optimism for a change (even if we are all screwed).
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| Re: The wise by richa |
4-Jan-04/7:28 PM |
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nice one Richa - I like the concept of a waning grasp lots.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
4-Jan-04/7:31 PM |
cool.
I wonder if it would be better for the omission of "ranch".
a ten nonetheless.
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| Re: Dance in my Golden Shower by SupremeDreamer |
7-Jan-04/7:58 AM |
gross.
having the spinach and the vitamin first was just plain evil.
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| Re: BreakBeat TimeTravel by nentwined |
7-Jan-04/8:01 AM |
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I like how you suckered me into the rythm of it - but I could do without the last line.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
7-Jan-04/8:03 AM |
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Are you sure he sleeps with the fish??
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| Re: Last flight of a goose by Bobjim |
7-Jan-04/8:04 AM |
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| Re: Waiting to inhale (Stardust & God's Black Nostril) by Don-Quixote |
7-Jan-04/8:23 AM |
I dunno, religion is tough to pick on with a straight face anymore. Kindof like bitch-slapping someone with a learning disability for not knowing linear math; tough to tell who's more retarded.
To do it in a non-informative way - without explanation, is adopting the same philosophies that a believer relies on.
Not that I don't do the same damn thing.
That having been said, I find this entertaining enough to give it a yellowed snowman (courtesy of SupremeDreamer).
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
8-Jan-04/1:57 PM |
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Rings well - the punctuation could be cleaned up a bit though (please).
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
8-Jan-04/1:58 PM |
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a very nice ditty, and not a bit shitty.
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| Re: Acrylic Sunrise by MacFrantic |
8-Jan-04/2:01 PM |
Love the title lots.
The litany of basic color names didn't quite work for me though. If it wasn't fairly similar in structure to something I just wrote, I might like it more (I've been in a "sky" phase).
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
8-Jan-04/2:03 PM |
nice start - kill the first comma and put it after vineyard then kill one after past.
kill the first "And"
And the second one.
Maybe trade the third and last for a "So".
A nice little tale.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Jan-04/12:37 PM |
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Running out of stuff from 2002!
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| Re: Da Ghetto by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
11-Jan-04/12:40 PM |
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Bling bling prose, I like angle with the parenthetical sober commentary.
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| Re: O Endless Angst, Thou Stingeth Me by Goad |
13-Jan-04/1:51 PM |
"with the voices of owls"
nice.
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