regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Feb-03/3:40 AM |
thought this was very good the last stanza says it all >>>>9, shorten the middle if you can sir.
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Re: The Eskimo and the fish by INTRANSIT |
12-Feb-03/8:16 AM |
your intro's are always your strongest asset, the last Stan seems rushed which is a shame for otherwise its a strong piece of lit....7
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Re: Dust by Caducus |
12-Feb-03/8:19 AM |
you really ripped your guts open in this, heartfelt and characteristically your finest.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
12-Feb-03/8:22 AM |
in parts sublimely told, in other parts (middle) you digress too much and lose the point -7-
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Re: The Eye by Enki |
12-Feb-03/8:23 AM |
Cant for the life of me underststand your point in this? -no vote
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regarding some deleted poem... |
12-Feb-03/8:27 AM |
Different I quite liked it.
Both are rather sticky but toffee is better, with sex you have the argument over who sleeps in the wet patch ..7
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Re: Starving at Tiffany's by horus8 |
12-Feb-03/8:31 AM |
At last we meet sir I have read your work and like your sensitive pieces best, sarcasm is inferior to you only entertain it when the devil on your shoulder sits on its chip and teases the Angel for being so tedious.
By the way this is a keeper my young fry.....8
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regarding some deleted poem... |
12-Feb-03/8:54 AM |
If pens had feelings they would cry ink for hours over this.
Use your imagination....4 lashes for you now stiffen those knees.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
12-Feb-03/8:59 AM |
So much to chew on here (excuse the pun) No, my dear friend this put the who in my ha. ....8.
I say well done
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regarding some deleted poem... |
13-Feb-03/3:51 AM |
You have captured the decadence of winter and the affect is has on ones emotions, a concept hard to achieve and you have done it magnificently -bravo I say, bravo
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Re: The Voice of the Night (dedicated to Mr. PIG) by Sylvia Bravo |
18-Feb-03/4:22 AM |
How charming my dear, thank you this is wonderful god bless you
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Re: Iterated Fuck by nentwined |
19-Feb-03/5:05 AM |
I say Sir, one may say this is an intersting read but the profane manner in which our most personal anatomical parts are described is awful, please stop watching hotel porn, My offer is a 5 marks lost on degrading penis
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regarding some deleted poem... |
20-Feb-03/12:07 PM |
Ding Dong, I say !
this is wonderful.
But... My dear 'Obstinate' is the correct spelling however.
'There is love to be made' fits perfectly like a glove, and its such a pleasure to read such profoundly alluring poetry, my darling I salute you and kiss your fragrant hand that velvets the page with your genial brush of passion.
I know you must tire of the countless requests to read ones work, but if you would oblige me your opinion on the trilogy of haikus I have compiled I would be most honoured,
Thank you In advance. ...9...
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regarding some deleted poem... |
20-Feb-03/12:10 PM |
By the way I was just perusing Mr Horus work and his website and my oh my what a handsome prince he is. My darling other half made me feel most unattractive and one was not amused, I always have Enid from the dales though who finds me most fanciful and dandy.
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Re: Pinjur by Shardik |
21-Feb-03/9:26 AM |
I wish to comment on this and fear the ramnifications for you as some think you as I and that is not the case. However I dont usually curse but fuck them !
This is a great piece of work, keep your chin up and your pen on paper, you grace it my good sir...8
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Re: Pinjur by Shardik |
21-Feb-03/9:26 AM |
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regarding some deleted poem... |
22-Feb-03/5:02 PM |
This shows your consternation about something my dear, I do hope you are okay, love and thoughts MP.
Try and get some context and shape to it, your in my prayers tonight my dear.
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Re: His Dying Words (2nd draft) by Ranger |
23-Feb-03/4:59 AM |
A good effort my young sire, however heartblink is a failed image it doesn't really work so amend it and consult me once you have finished. May I offer you respectability in a 7, quite moving.
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Re: His Dying Words (2nd draft) by Ranger |
23-Feb-03/5:00 AM |
I see your an amiable laddie, who kindly offers his comments would you oblige me sometime and grease my whip, onw would appreciate your input on mine
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Re: Clown of Misery by nocturnalism |
23-Feb-03/5:03 AM |
Yes, Yes one can see a story unfolding here, Artificial smiles, so true this day and age. 6
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