| Re: What you know by INTRANSIT |
27-Aug-03/12:55 PM |
A precious observation of self. I would remove the date and end it like.
"in this junkyard of bodies, hoping for an end
to these means."
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
27-Aug-03/12:57 PM |
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It gets cliched at the end, but it starts off very strong and well balanced.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
28-Aug-03/11:19 AM |
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I believe episode thirty seven of the oldie but goodie hit series "kung fu" with david carradine delt with this 'most' perplexing evolution of relationships. It was called "how the west was one" and involved the first sanfrasiscian dry cleanery... Oned by a jewish china man named Kim jungian Duckinstein fighting for his right to keep stains at bay. With the help of a white man (Mr. Carradine) impersonating a shaolin monk. He DID! Isn't that exciting?
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
28-Aug-03/11:24 AM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
28-Aug-03/11:27 AM |
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Champion! Heroic! wait... I think your teeth should get suck in the mud instead.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
28-Aug-03/1:54 PM |
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Indeed, perhaps nentwined had it upside down?
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| Re: Picasso: A Painters Revenge by SupremeDreamer |
28-Aug-03/2:01 PM |
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No color often is the brightest.
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| Re: Something on my Shoe by kthay |
28-Aug-03/2:16 PM |
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Yes, I've been beat for similiar.
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| Re: Invisible Poo by kthay |
28-Aug-03/2:17 PM |
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Another example of a fine observation.
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| Re: death by crwncka1 |
28-Aug-03/2:18 PM |
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I like how you made me say thar, but that was quick lived.1.
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| Re: hells atrium by crwncka1 |
28-Aug-03/2:21 PM |
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Let me guess... you are a lonely piece of poop look for a way back up and in. That's just brilliant 10 CHUDS FOR YOU.
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| Re: Naughty Word Game by kthay |
28-Aug-03/2:29 PM |
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Crotchless floss gumming.
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| Re: The Shack by Domus |
28-Aug-03/2:55 PM |
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Sounded good to me. I hate that fucking nigger. And I fucking hate escalades and basketball.
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| Re: Birds of Paradise by Domus |
28-Aug-03/2:58 PM |
"Soother her needless anxieties and
sonstant affronts." i believe there is a typo in here or two.
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| Re: Easter Egg Soup by kthay |
28-Aug-03/3:04 PM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
29-Aug-03/8:00 PM |
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Yes! I love when he ABC'S
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
30-Aug-03/12:37 PM |
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An impressive twist of fate. Victims of torture often make fine abusers. This poem brought to my heart much shame and retrospection. Where should I put my tip? It's the tip of an iceberg.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
30-Aug-03/12:42 PM |
This piece would work if it was halved and doubled. Do you understand? Like this.
Blessed be the cold at heart;
Their sorrow is not seen
to those who wish to kill;
They hold the aces in their hands,
and like some obscene cataract
let them fall to the earth
where the wayward will;
There they trace out fates
and futures, battlefields and dreams â
They know the future and do not care;
let the world go still!
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
30-Aug-03/12:46 PM |
This should be a vilanelle working off of these two sentences.
"Blessed be the cold at heart; their sorrow will not be seen."
"There they trace out fates and futures, battlefields and dreams ".
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
30-Aug-03/1:16 PM |
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You have to respect the way some people drown though. You know sinkers, flailers, floaters. Those in boats.
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