| Re: The Right Thing To Do by Bethy |
30-Aug-05/11:42 AM |
A) Points for "groovy"
B) not "naughty bits" instead "bubbies"
C) Nice switch at the end
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| Re: a comment on Present, tense by INTRANSIT |
30-Aug-05/11:34 AM |
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| Re: a comment on Present, tense by INTRANSIT |
30-Aug-05/5:01 AM |
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Yeah. I knew there was something that needed changing to make this work. the house is now a home.
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| Re: Out of a White Hole by ALChemy |
29-Aug-05/5:51 AM |
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Ha! Universe inside the mind ! Love it !
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| Re: Shoestring Salutation by MacFrantic |
28-Aug-05/8:01 AM |
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| Re: The Moment of Over by Bethy |
28-Aug-05/7:59 AM |
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Um, aside from the hiccups in the beat ,it works.
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| Re: a comment on No More Autumn Poems (Edit) by Sasha |
27-Aug-05/8:21 AM |
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Steely Dan / Bush literacy. ACE!!!!! I picked up a book by Cummings flipped it open and thought " my god! this is worse than the O'Hara I'm fumbling with!" and promptly put it back on the shelf. So, the upshot of this conversation is: Generally speaking, better poems have music in them. Thanks guys! 'Preciate your time.
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| Re: a comment on Tarragon by D. $ Fontera |
26-Aug-05/6:56 AM |
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Mortar and pestle perhaps? I agree chasses has to go. But are we eating cooking or dancing here, um, perhaps it's (eat) that needs to go? Damn close though. Brings me back to Instructions to a sculptor by Christof.
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| Re: a comment on Quietus Proprietus by INTRANSIT |
26-Aug-05/6:48 AM |
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Rephrase? Delete? Why? , of course. Thank you.
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| Re: Apollinaire: Mirabeau Bridge by Sasha |
26-Aug-05/6:16 AM |
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I just went back and read Zodiacs- Come away with me Carly- and it seemed to echo the sound/rhythm of a villanelle. So does this, to me. Am I right? Or do I need therapy? :/
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| Re: a comment on With You at an Ancient Temple by Sasha |
26-Aug-05/6:10 AM |
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Do you think i should strengthen the echoing sounds in -Quietus?
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| Re: a comment on Dear Lord, by INTRANSIT |
25-Aug-05/10:32 AM |
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Thanks. I went through this about five times trying to get 8 syllables per line. I gave up and let my "ear" tell me what to do. I've wondered about a short caesura in that last line and I had a comma in it. You might be right.
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| Re: With You at an Ancient Temple by Sasha |
25-Aug-05/8:56 AM |
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I read this several times to be sure I got the most out of it. Thank you for your time, Sasha.
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| Re: Wrapping a Gift by Dovina |
24-Aug-05/3:28 PM |
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Who cares what he thinks anyway. I say, Cork Pumps and a pair of daisy dukes should do the trick!
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| Re: a comment on Quietus Proprietus by INTRANSIT |
24-Aug-05/3:26 PM |
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And Christopher Reeves Thought he was superman till a bed-sore took him out.
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| Re: a comment on Quietus Proprietus by INTRANSIT |
24-Aug-05/3:21 PM |
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you wanna get hit by a car? gawd I hope not lol.
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| Re: Wrapping a Gift by Dovina |
24-Aug-05/3:19 PM |
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| Re: Wrapping a Gift by Dovina |
24-Aug-05/2:58 PM |
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A bunch of no-nos. By that I mean you can just lose the beginning nos', the changes of mind.
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| Re: a comment on No More Autumn Poems (Edit) by Sasha |
24-Aug-05/5:59 AM |
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Not your box. Saha's. Now, go ahead, ALChemy, chime in. I know you want to. I'm listening.
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| Re: a comment on No More Autumn Poems (Edit) by Sasha |
24-Aug-05/5:57 AM |
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Pretentious? no. Precocious? No. Polyglot? YUP! But so is Pound. Now, what is it about non american/ english poetry that many poets feel is superior? Yes I'm Pounding again. I really don't care to continue writing the tripe I have been but being an O>T>R driver makes it difficult to get any kind of education. So I'm stuck in a difficult do-it-yourself place. Suggestions?
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