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The Right Thing To Do (Other) by Bethy I met this man
while having coffee, alone
we talked for hours,
then he offered to drive me home.
I said, "No."
Up the ladder:
Re-drafting
Down the ladder:
Pink BAlls
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.8333335
Posted: August 30, 2005 11:00 AM PDT; Last modified: August 31, 2005 10:11 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.493059 Overall Rank: 2801 Comments:
[7]
Dovina @ 12.72.22.255
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30-Aug-05/11:11 AM
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Reply
Oh my goodness! Belay that, I feel I have no goodness. What a romp! I want to ask if it's fiction, but won't.
[n/a]
Bethy @ 24.222.32.194
> Dovina
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30-Aug-05/5:16 PM
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Reply
Fiction, and thanks Dovina, :) Bethy
A) Points for "groovy"
B) not "naughty bits" instead "bubbies" C) Nice switch at the end
Thank you INTRANSIT glad you like it...:) Bethy
How dare you sully us with the lurid details of your repulsive love life? You're a disgusting harlot who knows no shame. Get off this site. -0-
I am sorry if I offended you, it is a story, and it is not about me. I am hurt that you would call me a harlot, and unfortunately, I do know shame...I am a decent woman with very good morals, and it does me no good to reveal my personal life...And as far as being dismissed by you with regards to this site...I think not...Thank you for reading my poem :) Bethy
Last year I was shortlisted for a special Poemeranker Maturity Award. Only those rankers who have demonstrated a sustained commitment to maturity in all aspects of their conduct are allowed to to have one. I hope now you'll realise it's quite within my powers to dismiss whomever I want from this site. I have been in touch with the FBI and they're monitoring the situation. Step out of line again and they'll come down on your ISP like a ton of bricks.
Nice to see you in top forme again, btw.
sexual outer space is horrible.
It brings to mind that Sublime song "Date Rape"... I think it could be shortened and made a little less detailed to be more effective.
spelling or comma in the last line.
spelling...:) :) ty Bethy
what the?
I have just been contacted by the FBI and they informed me of the changes you made to your (once lewd) poeme. You'll be pleased to know they've accepted the rewording and will not be pursuing the matter any further. Kind regards, -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
Whew! thank goodness, that was a close call...I give you a *10* for your apology... ;) ;) ;) oops there must be something in my eye...oh, its just a tear...:) Bethy :) all better now
Really sweet of you guys.
Really.
Thankyou Al,:) not in all my life have I ever been called such a hurtful name, D-A,PI, made me cry...not by what he voted(those are just numbers) but the way that he judged me rather than the poem. Writing is like a release on reality, I get to live through other characters. I have fun with creating adventure. Some fiction, some non-fiction. I write about my brother(my twin) and how I am watching him die in front of my eyes,(he is the stone man) and I am his sunshine. I love words...wheather they are spelled right or not, I read everything, and love imagination. I am truly a free spirit. Thank you my friend...:) Bethy
I was once a free spirit... until the weight of the world crushed my hopes, my dreams, my micro-machines, and worst of all, my legs. I've been in a Wheeled-Chair for more than 60 years now. Life doesn't seem worth living. The only thing that gets me up in the morning is a giant pneumatic hoist.
Good and memorable poem
Thank you Jon for your kind comments, I have missed your poetry...nice to see you back...:) Bethy
I went scouting for foreign and exotic rhymes to use in my poems. Consider this couplet from a Yetxarian death-tribe in the Pelmati Desert: Ixkapa detripontix flovixkeragla vope / Trixdapa hetripontix plovixteragla kope. Which means: Ten nights without water / Same as one night without [untranslatable word that means something along the lines of sex+music+shot-from-cannon+pastry]. They are considered to be some of the most thrill-seeking zen-trance masters in their quadrant; they sleep/meditate for hours upon hours and then suddenly jump up and thrash about for minutes, followed once again by deep mind-hibernation.
forgive my snail like manner for not getting back to you...this sounds amazing!!! is there a site i could go too...if so, let me know...I would like to read more about this tribe...are you in the process of writing a poem about them...:) Bethy
okay, but whats the point.
that was probably the right thing to do. definitely not the adventurous thing, but probably the right thing. the length of it suits the situation, but i am curious as to what was said for hours on end...
well, this is the VERY short version of the real poem, the uneditted version had ALOT more details...I was actually thinking about posting it again...:) Bethy
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