on some deleted poem
5 Jan 2004, 12:04 PM
10. can(s) for perfection. It's good to have more than one tool in the box.
on some deleted poem
6 Jan 2004, 7:39 AM
I don't want to spoil this for others, though I'd like to assess it better than just saying: The period in s-2 bugs me. and I get a little lost with the (touch of a glass) I really think I understand this, glitches aside. 8 because I'm unsure. How was my assesment of the other poem, anywho.
on some deleted poem
6 Jan 2004, 7:49 AM
Excellent raw material! for a song OR a poem. no matter that it is disorganised. Take your time to sift through this. Separate the simple stuff from the deep and better images/phrasings. See how much good dstuff there is, then add to it. 7 it's there, work it.
on The burlesque circus clown [revised] by Don-Quixote
6 Jan 2004, 4:37 PM
Sorry bro. Didn't know I'd left ya hangin'. This hits my ears much better though. Who dropped the blue four is beyond me.
on Dance in my Golden Shower by SupremeDreamer
6 Jan 2004, 4:39 PM
Um, no thanks. If it's all the same, i'll stay dirty.
on Down The Hall by Blindpoetry
7 Jan 2004, 6:25 PM
A penny is single, solitary, small, one. An excellent image to work with. Stretch the penny over your poem.
Poetry aint easy kiddo. I'd lend you my copy of "Poetry for dummies", except it is part of me, permanently.
I had it sewn under the skin of my left thigh.
Poetry aint easy kiddo. I'd lend you my copy of "Poetry for dummies", except it is part of me, permanently.
I had it sewn under the skin of my left thigh.
on Black Beach by Caducus
7 Jan 2004, 6:29 PM
Something about this screams SONNET! There's plenty of material and plenty of great lines. "...white flag still blows" gives me an image of the backsides of crashing waves from the air.
on Vietnamese Dog Steaks by DreamerSupreme
7 Jan 2004, 6:34 PM
I hope this is a first draft. Pull a draught and pull in the laces on this new shoe.
on A Kiss by devilishnutcase
7 Jan 2004, 6:49 PM
Leaves? I think you mean LeaDs. (May) my lips...
Compact and honest.
Compact and honest.
on BreakBeat TimeTravel by nentwined
7 Jan 2004, 7:00 PM
igpbgh. that is all.
on Vietnamese Dog Steaks by DreamerSupreme
7 Jan 2004, 7:40 PM
here's a bone for your dogs.
on some deleted poem
7 Jan 2004, 7:43 PM
What did you do? ya got wings. what fer?
Roll- on the green slopes. I saw horses. in my mind. no, I mean....awwwwfergetit.
Roll- on the green slopes. I saw horses. in my mind. no, I mean....awwwwfergetit.
on Waiting to inhale (Stardust & God's Black Nostril) by Don-Quixote
7 Jan 2004, 8:10 PM
First of all, I know very little about drugs, how to "do" them and what the factors are involving such. So some of this poem loses me. But that's my lack of knowledge, not your poem. Moldy crackers should go, I think. Disneys' Aladdin popped into my head. Assuming (andante) is referring to winter, I love it. Had to look up the word though. I love the fleas, wool plaugue, and scarlet clouds. Over all I think it's fine as it sits. neener neener neener.
on Waiting to inhale (Stardust & God's Black Nostril) by Don-Quixote
7 Jan 2004, 8:24 PM
no. soldered sushi.
on Sonnet Eighteen by devilishnutcase
7 Jan 2004, 8:32 PM
4 for the comments 2 for the psuedo-sonnet.
on some deleted poem
8 Jan 2004, 12:34 PM
have you been dipping into the Ginsberg too? Now that I've had the time to think on this a little. It made me think (religion, of course) but also about our armed forces in Iraq. Headline influences, perhaps.
on some deleted poem
8 Jan 2004, 12:36 PM
Sticky schtick.
on some deleted poem
8 Jan 2004, 12:45 PM
I'm still taking it in......
on Dance in my Golden Shower by SupremeDreamer
8 Jan 2004, 12:50 PM
Other countries wallow in their own pee because they have no "indoor plumbing". Still others, who have "proper receptacles", bathe in pee for entertainment purposes. No irony there, ha!
on some deleted poem
9 Jan 2004, 2:38 PM
Note to myself: Jan 9th, good for humor, bad for giving money and silent prayers to underpriveleged persons. ha.