Poemranker [20 most recent comments by Dovina (401-420) and replies]

on the magic rock by nypoet22 24 Mar 2007, 4:24 PM

Yes to the first two questions, no to the third, and ace to the last verse.

on The Finding by Skamper 24 Mar 2007, 8:56 AM

Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth. Thus I render what they have often preached to me: you are too vague; some nice lines in your three poems here, but whatever they are saying is too well camouflaged. But youâre doing okay here and seem able to tolerate guff, and thus might last awhile.

on Hairball by jessicazee 24 Mar 2007, 5:58 AM

Writers in English often think haiku must have three lines with 5, 7, and 5 syllables, a misunderstanding of the Japanese onji. Concision is key.

thing on my rug,
I forgot to wipe
thank you cat

Just a suggestion.

replying on This life is sheer nonsense by Prince of Void 23 Mar 2007, 10:30 AM

Explain the word "deserve," please, since you seemingly misuse it here.

replying on A Single Strand of Golden Yellow by Aetius 23 Mar 2007, 10:27 AM

Apparently, in your fumbling bum-toweled manner, you have confused my species with Crepidula fornicata.

replying on The Small Ones by Dovina 23 Mar 2007, 10:19 AM

May I see your prawne license, sir?

replying on This life is sheer nonsense by Prince of Void 22 Mar 2007, 3:29 PM

Sadness is your choice - okay. Maybe you prefer to be sad, or maybe you think it's inevitable. Either way, there are other attitudes, and they also could your choices. It really matters little what your circumstances are.

replying on This life is sheer nonsense by Prince of Void 22 Mar 2007, 3:16 PM

I know a man with spina bifida. He has suffered 45 operations and has never walked. He lives in pain. He makes me laugh; he asks how my cold is coming along; he discusses philosophy and science; he seldom complains. That's his choice. Your choice is yours.

replying on This life is sheer nonsense by Prince of Void 22 Mar 2007, 3:01 PM

Then you accept fate and believe that any choice you appear to have is but illusion. And in making that decision you have chosen hades.

on This life is sheer nonsense by Prince of Void 22 Mar 2007, 2:29 PM

So eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow you die. Give up all this senseless gloom.

on Oliver by Stephen Robins 22 Mar 2007, 2:27 PM

If it were not for your straining chief, Oliver, this could move erotically into a second verse of laughingly intense intimacy.

replying on The Small Ones by Dovina 22 Mar 2007, 2:23 PM

I may choose to forgive you, but as a complex, thinking oddity on a new twig of the life tree, I reserve for myself freedom to tread otherwise.

replying on The Small Ones by Dovina 22 Mar 2007, 2:21 PM

This it truly the most accurate description of one of my poems you have, in all your past blubbering and squirting, presented. The âcroneâ characterization of the narrator is, of course, unfounded and irrelevant, but probably necessary as inner justification for outer wrinkled flab.

replying on A Single Strand of Golden Yellow by Aetius 22 Mar 2007, 2:08 PM

Really? I'd have expected "my father and grandfather never did" to yield this reaction.

replying on A Single Strand of Golden Yellow by Aetius 22 Mar 2007, 2:06 PM

So how did he fare when Zionist Rebel made an attempt on The Loom of Lost Souls?

replying on Untitled by Dovina 21 Mar 2007, 5:38 PM

You can call it "short poem" if you want, but I like the attitude of Japanese haiku. I don't exactly try to imitate them, but I try for their mindset.

Thanks for the comments.

replying on Untitled by Dovina 21 Mar 2007, 5:19 PM

Sentiment, morality and metaphor are not absent from Japanese haiku. Basho, Buscon, Issa, Shiki all used them. True, the Japanese almost always used seasonal references, which English writers, sadly, have thought unnecessary. And we tend to use Western literary devices, which really donât work well in haiku.

replying on Untitled by Dovina 21 Mar 2007, 10:35 AM

Although most haiku are untitled, it does seem a strange title; maybe "Blank" or "_____" should fill that space. Have you, too, inverted the scale, giving nines to the terrible?

replying on A Single Strand of Golden Yellow by Aetius 21 Mar 2007, 10:32 AM

My grandmother tried to make knitters and crocheters out my sister and me. She had no loom, and never wove more than tales. My sister learned; I rebelled. Ephialtes of Athens would have been appalled.

replying on A Single Strand of Golden Yellow by Aetius 20 Mar 2007, 6:40 PM

Itâs because my mother and grandmother both worked with knitting yarn; my father and grandfather never did. In fact, my grandmother would unravel worn-out sweaters, salvage the usable yarn, and wind it into skeins for new projects.