Re: a comment on The Rockets’ Song by Dovina	13-Dec-04/2:27 PM
If you have greater worth, then you have no need to assert it, and therefore no need to write.
Re: a comment on The Rockets’ Song by Dovina	13-Dec-04/1:22 PM
You must receive great pleasure in being unintelligible to everyone who's not special enough to be let in on your slang, to be one of the people who know what it means. Strange, I thought writing was a means of communication.
Re: The wreck of a Memphis-Atlanta Greyhound by zodiac	13-Dec-04/12:01 PM
You have written me a poem. How very touching. Of course you will take my saying so as facetious. But no. And to show my appreciation, I will comment at length, without slander or name calling, and with an only purpose of constructive feedback. It could not have been written during the accident, but after it, making the title not only too long, but confusing. Comma before “given” in versa 2. “always more-or-less the same” seems neither accurate, nor logically sound or even a line that says anything. Besides, the thought is expressed above. “’God-fearing’ once in his life, uncynically.” Doesn’t say much. Everyone does it once. Try “often.” The man who was thrown was on the bus, and the narrator was on the bus, else how could the narrator develop so detailed an opinion of him or know he had been in the lavatory. Yet the man flew over the dash (Do busses have dashes?) and through the windshield of the bus, while all of the other passengers were only pressed forward against seatbacks. The narrator had to have been sitting near the front of the bus to see the man’s flight after he penetrated the windshield, and remained in his seat during the flight, or at least not far from it, to notice the man’s expression. The thrown man probably landed on the car involved in the head-on collision (I assume it was head-on), yet no mention of it. When a bus hits a car head-on, and the driver of the car is not hurt badly, then the collision happened at low speed, which would cause little impact to the much-heavier bus. Okay, if you say so, but it seems the physics should be presented more believably if you want us to consider the philosophy. Saying, “the physics of the thing are suspect.” Isn’t enough. “up-falling rain of pebbled glass” Since you’ve opened this ethereal aspect, this line could be related to the thrown man’s character as you developed it above, bring cause to the result, bringing relevance to the collision. Just an idea.
Re: a comment on Peptalk in the Dugout by Dovina	13-Dec-04/10:58 AM
I’ll yield to experience on that.
Re: a comment on Peptalk in the Dugout by Dovina	13-Dec-04/10:58 AM
I’ve considered that little red x a few times, but then reconsidered because, while annoying, those comments by asstrological signers add credence to the utter nonsense of asstrology.
Re: a comment on The Rockets’ Song by Dovina	13-Dec-04/10:18 AM
You are so, so cool! Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey.
Re: A Glass of Milk Inagodadavida by EAger to Offend	12-Dec-04/6:56 PM
Your title is a confusingly worded sign in West Virginia. Once past it, the grass is green.
Re: Some Poem by jauser	12-Dec-04/6:47 PM
Try again when you're sober.
Re: two by hendrimike	12-Dec-04/6:45 PM
The second verse is a bit preachy and some of the rhymes are forced, and it's wordy, but the idea is good and your feelings are good, and it's a good thing to say in some succinct way.
Re: a comment on The Rockets’ Song by Dovina	12-Dec-04/9:45 AM
Oh, I'm getting it! You're moving your definitions of nebulous terms around to suit your most recent arguement, rather than, as I am, sticking to the dictionary definitions. Slang, by the way, is alright if we both know what it means; otherwise it's no better than jargon.
Re: That One Time Last Summer, Remember? by jessicazee	12-Dec-04/9:37 AM
A improvement over "Going Camping," quite good, but I wish you'd remove that dripping shower.
Re: Peptalk in the Dugout by Dovina	12-Dec-04/9:01 AM
(submitted for application to The Rutherford Club)
Re: a comment on Limbs by Dovina	11-Dec-04/2:04 PM
That’s both plain and civil, and not a bad suggestion. Stinginess has its place, but maybe real sentences would work better here. Live oak limbs do not often hang, however, they usually rise. Maybe: Live oak limbs rise Crooked, unorganized. Lightning bolts hang Jagged, as if lost going home. Never linear for long, Deluded by fluff, They wander on whims. Built in an instant Or century, Like me, they assume The easiest shape. Thanks.
Re: a comment on Dancing in Memories: Slipping Away In The House On The Hill by Stacy Stewart	11-Dec-04/12:37 PM
John Yuk Dupe?
Re: a comment on The Rockets’ Song by Dovina	11-Dec-04/11:51 AM
We both know the meanings of "shocked" and "dismayed," or you can look them up. Why do you carry on as if they meant the same thing? The same could be said for "plum" as used in "mouth plum" and as defined in dictionaries. I do wish you'd calm down sometimes.
Re: a comment on Limbs by Dovina	11-Dec-04/11:44 AM
That, unfortunately for all who may wish it, was not the reason for periods where sentences do not end. They denote breaks or ends of incomplete sentences. Of course I did not place them outside of quotation marks, as some do. If you wish to converse civilly, I could add that most of the punctuation, except the dashes, could be removed.
Re: a comment on Dancing in Memories: Slipping Away In The House On The Hill by Stacy Stewart	10-Dec-04/6:37 PM
You must forgive zociac. He's lost most of his vision and 90% of his frontal lobe over there in Karak. We all try to pitch-in with the tedious chore of interpreting his comments. This time I'm afraid he's seen a host of periods and thought they were colons. How he thought they are excellently used I can't say, but, again, please forgive him. Actually all these periods are a bit like pepper sprinkled about where often a comma, or even no mark at all would suffice, don't you think. Would you like to join the Zodiac Protection Charity?
Re: MONSOON by rrashi	10-Dec-04/6:19 PM
Better than your last. I've never felt a monsoon, but almost can. Could do without "The most poignant pictures it brings," Check punctuation and grammar in the last 4 lines.
Re: a comment on Limbs by Dovina	10-Dec-04/5:38 PM
Have you read it yet?
Re: a comment on Limbs by Dovina	10-Dec-04/5:32 PM
Well then, oak tree limbs do look weird sometimes. You are the weird one.