poemranker ::That One Time Last Summer, Remember? by jessicazee

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Free verse № 116400

That One Time Last Summer, Remember?

Member since 2002 · Posted 11 Dec 2004 · 4 comments

First a berry stain on your pine needled sole, and you just say "look at the fire I made" It's a quick death, a campfired moth. Ash so light, wings disappear, flying, dying again toward the canopy. The shower drips all night, mulberry trees whisper, "please shake us" "we need to let things go"

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mean 7.25 weighted 5.27 rank 3926 views 242 View voting details →

4 votes so far. Yours would make 5.4 votes so far

4 comments

[10] EAger to Offend 12-Dec-04/3:18 AM Reply
Inexplicibly good! I get a great feeling from this. Both intimate and delicate. 10
[10] Dan garcia-Black 12-Dec-04/5:26 AM Reply
Ditto
[9] Dovina 12-Dec-04/9:37 AM Reply
A improvement over "Going Camping," quite good, but I wish you'd remove that dripping shower.
[n/a] jessicazee › Dovina 13-Dec-04/3:19 PM Reply
Thanks for the nice comments, everyone. I'll think what to do with the shower line. You're right, it's clunky.