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Dancing in Memories: Slipping Away In The House On The Hill (Free verse) by Stacy Stewart
Miss, Tell me your street address And I’ll point you to your home. The street lamp flickering beneath Where they stood. The alley ways filling up with Their night time doomed visions. The lady over eighty just sat Looking at the street signs; where she Couldn't remember the name anymore. Jazz singers from one street played Music in the ladies ears. She felt the beat, with each tear That fell to her feet. The same tune she heard once Before when her children were near. Leaving her alone in her new house On top of the hill. I can imagine it, Miss. The tune in my ear. Thinking everyone is crazy, those Night time ghastly visions you must see. The lady just stood there her tears now gone. She stood and twirled around. Music gliding over the few trees Dancing upon the street lights Fluttering with memories. The lady starts mumbling some words. Something must have jogged her memory. It was a brisk feeling of November Numbing her finger tips as she twirled And danced upon the street. Watching the lights dance like tiny stars Twinkling in a clear sky. She sits down forgetting the rest. A man walks up to her wearing only white. He must be here to help me, she thought. On, this cold crisp November Night. I lay back on a narrow hard bed. As he hands me a blanket, "You must be cold with the window open Elizabeth.” Yet, the music was still playing tiny Memories for me, even as he spoke. He closes the window where bars are Placed over them. Straps me in bed and turns the radio That beats in my ear off, for the night. I don’t understand what’s going on, Mister? Where am I?

Down the ladder: homer simpson

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Weighted score: 5.119203
Overall Rank: 5790
Posted: December 8, 2004 5:17 AM PST; Last modified: December 8, 2004 5:17 AM PST
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Comments:
[n/a] Stacy Stewart @ 208.20.95.32 | 8-Dec-04/5:18 AM | Reply
My own version of: MUSIC SWIMS BACK TO ME
By: Anne Sexton.
[n/a] zodiac @ 212.118.14.17 > Stacy Stewart | 9-Dec-04/6:01 AM | Reply
Excellent use of colons.
[n/a] Dovina @ 69.175.6.101 > zodiac | 10-Dec-04/6:37 PM | Reply
You must forgive zociac. He's lost most of his vision and 90% of his frontal lobe over there in Karak. We all try to pitch-in with the tedious chore of interpreting his comments. This time I'm afraid he's seen a host of periods and thought they were colons. How he thought they are excellently used I can't say, but, again, please forgive him. Actually all these periods are a bit like pepper sprinkled about where often a comma, or even no mark at all would suffice, don't you think. Would you like to join the Zodiac Protection Charity?
[n/a] richa @ 81.178.245.106 > Dovina | 11-Dec-04/3:46 AM | Reply
in the comment: 'By: Anne Sexton'.
[n/a] zodiac @ 212.118.11.11 > Dovina | 11-Dec-04/6:09 AM | Reply
Hey, ace slobbering incomprehensible personal attack! You're probably also the kind of person who would claim I'm "hiding behind a computer screen" and then, upon learning my real name, make some shit crack about how it contains the words "Dyke", "Up", and "John". Like I hadn't heard those a million times already by the second grade.
[n/a] Dovina @ 69.175.6.101 > zodiac | 11-Dec-04/12:37 PM | Reply
John Yuk Dupe?
[n/a] zodiac @ 212.118.11.11 > Dovina | 11-Dec-04/11:35 PM | Reply
Yawn.
[7] jessicazee @ 64.12.116.135 | 8-Dec-04/11:20 PM | Reply
A little confusing point-of view-wise but I am into it big time anyways?
[n/a] richa @ 81.178.245.106 | 11-Dec-04/3:47 AM | Reply
Needs quotation marks around the first two lines or the poem looks like some misguided tense experiment.
[8] SupremeDreamer @ 65.45.152.4 | 11-Dec-04/4:51 AM | Reply
Good concept, mostly well done-- though I think it could be shortened a bit.

Blessed with eight.
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