Unless he's refering to himself being sculptured by the architects but that's quite a stretch. At least help us out with an "I'm" at the begining Caducus.

Please retract that! The planet cannot handle such evolutionary goals.

Yes I will say “But that’s the whole point.” See my comment to Alchemy. If you say “Exactly,” you are simply disagreeing with the Christian position that “To die is gain.” It’s alright to disagree, but please try to understand this dying woman’s position.

I did write in MS Word, but I wanted the capitals as a kind of Biblical parallel. "But the opposite is true" refers to the line directly above it. You say BOO because it seems contradictory. But for a Christian, a dying body is good because it brings her nearer to her God. “To be absent from the body is to be present with God.”

To me it represents one thing but it's kinda like saying God and expecting everyone to think of the same god your thinking of. I think it's lack of elaboration is due more to my laziness then sloppiness.

Thanks LadyPoet The bird thing was kinda an experiment. It in one way criticizes the pre-concieved religious symbolism of the tree and in that way contradicts it. I thought it would be appropriate to have the bird line interupt the poem but I conceed it does throw the reader off a bit. I looked up booth brink and amidst and there doesn't seem to be a problem. Brink: The upper edge of a steep or vertical slope. The verge. Amidst:(or Amid) Surrounded by; in the middle of. I must be missing something obvious I guess. Good suggestions. I hope there's a tree too. Lord knows I'll probably need it. Sorry about the punctuation I must have had something against periods that day.

That's some of the best criticism I've read. Actually it's from a regular prose story. It's just a poem one of the characters recalls after they actually find the tree. Story poems are incredibly hard to do well. Usually either the story or the poetry is hindered because of it. I admit the poems got alot of flaws. I really like it mostly for its sound. I think there's a sweet spot that floats between free-verse and conventional verse but it's hard as hell to hit. I looked up "amidst" and the first definition I got was "in the middle of" so maybe its an outdated usage of the word I don't know. Great suggestion for a change though. Pigeons and doves: And yet people treat them so differently. Sometimes when I write or draw I start with an image and just let the poem evolve piece by piece never exactly sure where it will go. This usually ends with a product that's high in sound, low in logic. Then I edit. I wonder if Wordsworth and Coleridge approached writing that way. Most of the story (that the poem is in) takes place in a dream world.(I know cliches abound) But the story was meant to be sort of a parable of the Gospels. It was my attempt to put the reader into the mind and perspective of a messiah in a way they could imagine and relate to. Not a good subject to write a first book on. I'd be a hypocrite to criticize your spelling. Although it's fun to point out because it happens so rarely with you. Sorry it took so long to reply. I was on vacation.