Re: Empty by Skamper	Dovina 208.127.114.22	30-Mar-07/4:42 PM
I think, like others do, that you should use better grammar - mot necessarily perfect grammar, but something closer to conformity. That way, someone besides you might get what you're saying.
Re: You can't send love to a voicemail. by drnick	Dovina 208.127.114.22	30-Mar-07/4:38 PM
Hi, it's me again, sending you love in a voicemail.
Re: Jai guru deva om by Crakyamuni	Dovina 208.127.114.22	30-Mar-07/4:37 PM
Are you a Beatles fan? "Across the Universe." How that relates to the ancient manuscript, Nag Hammadi, or why it is mere noise, I don't get. The Word or Logos is, I suppose, begotten. Perhaps whatever you mean is too involved for haiku.
Re: Her by Sasha	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/4:23 PM
Fast life, fading fast. The third stanza stands out for me, seems I can almost grasp this and then it flows away. Sometimes that's the best bit about reading anothers poems, how the meaning is just out of reach, yet there is an understanding. Nice write.
Re: You can't send love to a voicemail. by drnick	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/4:13 PM
Loving the title, so direct and harsh! Last line throws me a little though, not sure why, but if I replace 'just wait' with 'hang on' I get it to flow better. Plus it ties in with being on the phone if you know what I mean?
Re: a comment on Llamas by Skamper	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/4:07 PM
Exactly that! many thanx...
Re: a comment on Llamas by Skamper	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/4:01 PM
The title has no bearing, it was a random choice as I was titling this piece someone mentioned Llamas...I was/am lazy. Slide your new tongue between the cracks ties in more with what is written after than before it. I agree with the 'the' in line two and have adjusted it on my own copy. thanks for reading.
Re: a comment on The Finding by Skamper	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/3:58 PM
Portentious? Meaning they are literally that, a search and a finding? Hmmm...That's exactly what the writes are about. I think this poem needs nothing, it works for me. There isn't anything lurking behind shadows, it's all there...a little scrambled but I like my ideas that way.
Re: a comment on Paper Maker by Skamper	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/3:52 PM
LOL...Arid Air..isn't it though!! If we all stop using cliche's how long will it be before they become 'cool' and we can use them again?
Re: a comment on Paper Maker by Skamper	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/3:50 PM
Thankyou, I follow what you mean now. I write how I talk, I know thats a really bad cop-out, but that is how I do things. I like your revision and maybe it will help me in the future...
Re: a comment on The Search by Skamper	Skamper 202.6.129.18	30-Mar-07/3:46 PM
I get it! You don't get it! Understandable I guess...too hard to explain everything. It is what it is. Grammar and syntax have nothing to do with this, it's written with inner rhythm and left open to interpretation. Your last comment comes close to what I was trying to say, but I'm guessing that wasn't the intention. odd - odd eyes Darwin awards - too late for the stupid woman as she is pregnant it - the deafness of my cat - caused by odd coloured eyes, or the fact he's pure white three legged dance - he demanded the dance, which is to say, he called his three legged cat over to show me... Anyhooo...thanx muchly for taking the time to read and pass comments...it is appreciated (this and the finding are connected, I lost two cats in 3 days...one came back-poisoned)
Re: walls by Mutant_X	Crakyamuni 207.200.116.6	29-Mar-07/10:19 PM
I won't waste another moment on your dribble
Re: Cane by richa	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:23 PM
Hahahaha, heaven-that's funny. But seriously, I like what you've done here although I can't say I get anything from reading this. However that is probably because I am stupid. Yay.
Re: Llamas by Skamper	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:21 PM
I'm not sure what is going on here, but I like that it's not obvious. I got the feeling of a mind furious with anxious thought, which seemed to work out well. Nice rhythem, as well.
Re: A twisted Trail in Eden’s Garden by Dovina	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:17 PM
Very dark! I like it!
Re: a comment on Guarded Fool by drnick	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:16 PM
I'm glad I could remind you of anything to do with slaughter. That is my purpose.
Re: a comment on Guarded Fool by drnick	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:15 PM
I'm glad you held hope that a poem of mine was not rubbish, but perhaps this is because you don't know me. This poem is, as all of mine are, up for the reader to decide. It's whatever you think it's about.
Re: a comment on Guarded Fool by drnick	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:14 PM
Thanks, I get what you're saying but that wasn't intentional.
Re: a comment on Guarded Fool by drnick	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:12 PM
How about I staple it instead with my .40?
Re: a comment on Guarded Fool by drnick	drnick 24.247.112.155	29-Mar-07/3:12 PM
Women don't like me.