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on The cat who would fly by nentwined
11 Aug 2005, 1:54 PM
placid may not be the right word, k. it diminishes the impact of the rest of the otherwise strong poem.
haha i like it.... and i mean the spelling mistakes, too!
The rhythm is so good that glytches really stand out.
For example:
With four paws to cuddle to you
And two eyes opened so wide?
could be:
With four paws to cuddle you
And two eyes opened wide
Change the last two lines (too morbid) and you could probably get this published as a children's book. Brought out the kid in me a little.
Clever, Sad and droopy.
Proper.
I actually think this is a great poem. WELL DONE, 10!,
i also commend you for standing up for yourself infront of all these people stabbing at your faith.
fallen within the drenched raincoat she finds a penguin cavity filled with desire to run and roam and make pool noodles out of foam
Immediately remove your keyboard, shellac it, and donate it to the local museum. Next, buy a new one and finish this novel. Run straight home, Charlie: This. Is. Your. Golden. Ticket.
What class was this written in? Before lunch or after lunch? Details please.
Jon this is magnificent...its a fav for me...Bethy:)
Keep going...keep going...this is really great...Bethy:)
its like playing a record backwards...lol Bethy
I don,t know what to say...*9* Bethy:)
This is a concrete poem. Pretty neat on too.
Line 6 just affects the whole thing. Otherwise its a peach.
I very much like the ending - I think maybe too many small words pull the punch a bit.
David questioned, why can't we?