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Why...? (Free verse) by muffielouise
Standing at the waters edge I feel the energy flow threw my body Getting ready to ride It is like the vib of music Flowing threw my ears The anticipation of waiting for a good wave Is exzhilerating I know it will come 'I have to wait' Boarding down the face As it dies out And I am thrown off By the power of the rip curl My board is snaped in half It feels as if someone just broke my heart I want crumble to pieces Because I just lost my passion

Up the ladder: Horror Film
Down the ladder: Insanity

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 6.4444447
Weighted score: 5.7222223
Overall Rank: 1890
Posted: November 9, 2003 11:10 AM PST; Last modified: November 9, 2003 11:10 AM PST
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7!3

Comments:
[7] richa @ 81.178.129.21 | 9-Nov-03/11:14 AM | Reply
Through not threw and snapped not snaped.

Could be sheared of redundancies like 'I have to wait'.

Other than that a good effort
[4] sliver @ 63.190.72.255 | 9-Nov-03/11:16 AM | Reply
Start saving so yew ken by a knew bord
[8] Freethinker1602 @ 68.48.30.210 | 9-Nov-03/11:52 AM | Reply
KUDOS!!! :)
[1] horus8 @ 24.126.116.54 | 10-Nov-03/1:48 AM | Reply
Please do, but not in front of me. I'm not wearing shoes.
[7] 7!3 @ 219.93.174.102 | 10-Aug-05/6:10 AM | Reply
haha i like it.... and i mean the spelling mistakes, too!
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