Re: The balls of Thor by John Rambo	ALChemy 71.75.176.68	22-May-06/9:52 PM
Vikin' aye man!
Re: Godproof Hat by Dovina	ALChemy 71.75.176.68	22-May-06/10:11 PM
The last stanza reminds me of the closing animation of every Flintstone episode.
Re: Godproof Hat by Dovina	Niphredil 132.68.55.85	23-May-06/2:26 AM
Um, sorry, but this ain't a limerick. At least, the first stanza isn't. Alhough the rhyming scheme matches (aabba), limericks have very well-defined meter (three stressed syllables in lines 1,2,5 and two in lines 3,4) and this doesn't really fit the bill. Because of the differences in meter (and language, too, come to think of it), the second stanza appears quite unrelated to the first. Having said that, it's a funny, amusing piece of work... I especially liked the first stanza.
Re: Monsters by wilco	some deleted user 64.140.228.131	23-May-06/4:53 AM
Not your best, but very good work.
regarding some deleted poem...	LilMsLadyPoet 64.12.116.14	23-May-06/8:37 AM
Very cool...haven't been in to read or post for a while...was refreshing to find this! I would have changed 'is' to was,perhaps...? ("What could have been said is Blanketed by cowardice.) Excellent!
regarding some deleted poem...	ALChemy 71.75.176.68	23-May-06/9:09 AM
Poetry that critiques itself, how convenient. Now if only you could teach it to vote.
Re: Monsters by wilco	ALChemy 71.75.176.68	23-May-06/9:20 AM
Like Jim Morrison and John Lennon dueling. A little disassembled between stanzas but put in the voice of an effective singer it could work quite well.
regarding some deleted poem...	LilMsLadyPoet 64.12.116.14	23-May-06/9:28 AM
Any ideas for a fitting title?!
regarding some deleted poem...	ALChemy 71.75.176.68	23-May-06/9:29 AM
Been watching Disney's Fantasia huh?
Re: Numbers add to nothing by Caducus	LilMsLadyPoet 64.12.116.14	23-May-06/9:49 AM
The end fell flat, and rang hollow and disconnected...which is good, in this case! I notice you are an impartial observer all the way until the last line, then you pronounce some sort of judgment on it all. I am not sure of what your judgment is. Does his death change nothing, are you speaking to nothing changes in America because America continues to put people on death row and use capital punishment, or are you saying capital punishment changes nothing and killing goes on as usual? Or that his life and death is nothing because he is nothing? Or that his death changed nothing in the lives of those affected by his murders? I hate having to title things! But that said, I think it needs a better title. I don't mind it the way it is, as it leaves one to question what it is about, and to re=read to try to figure those questions out...which is never fully answered, for the reader. I wouldn't mind it being more clear, in showing your judgment either, though.
Re: Split Me by Sunny	LilMsLadyPoet 64.12.116.14	23-May-06/9:53 AM
I'm lost...I couldn't wrap my brain around where you were going with this! There were some good lines, and imagery, though.
regarding some deleted poem...	ALChemy 71.75.176.68	23-May-06/9:57 AM
Where lava touches the sea.
Re: I hate people by Bazilla	Edna Sweetlove 81.179.85.105	23-May-06/10:20 AM
Passable. Dubious use of apostrophes.
Re: I hate people by Bazilla	Edna Sweetlove 81.179.85.105	23-May-06/10:20 AM
Passable. Dubious use of apostrophes.
Re: Youth by thepinkbunnyofdoom	Edna Sweetlove 81.179.85.105	23-May-06/10:23 AM
I could only get as far as the first few lines. When I read words like "choken" I give up. Also I am sad your donkeys are broken.
Re: American Poet by horus8	Edna Sweetlove 81.179.85.105	23-May-06/10:29 AM
Pretentious and ungrammatical. An interesting combination, but not a very attractive one.
Re: Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	Edna Sweetlove 81.179.85.105	23-May-06/10:31 AM
Obscure.
Re: The Angry Bush by wilco	Edna Sweetlove 81.179.85.105	23-May-06/10:32 AM
Not very subtle but the message is OK.
Re: Descartes' Immortal Truth by Edna Sweetlove	Dan garcia-Black 69.235.250.244	23-May-06/10:44 AM
This poem is excellent but for one fact. The dead will have, on occasion, a bowel movement after bacteria and gas have their way with food left in stomach and intestines. So, one may shit and not be. Sorry.
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 17.255.240.6	23-May-06/10:50 AM
A good oblique description of what I've struggled to describe. Need a comma after "your lips brush" or some such grammetical fix. I'm not thrilled with "Sheer will of spirit" It sounds almost like faking it, which is not what you mean.