Re: Another Date by Dovina	pete 62.56.126.204	6-Aug-07/4:51 PM
and shed a bitter tear
Re: To a Grunting Man on the Train by Christof	Ranger 86.153.11.37	7-Aug-07/1:52 AM
Mostly marvellous, the rhythm reminds me of the clicking of a train except for the middle of stanza two where it becomes a bit disjointed. I didn't see any need for the backstage pass, but the rest is grand.
regarding some deleted poem...	Ranger 86.153.11.37	7-Aug-07/1:58 AM
There is no such thing as the 'glass ceiling' in business. It is simply that men are inherently better at kissing bums. Imagine the following thought experiment, exclusively stolen from Scott Adams: a man and a woman of equal qualifications are both vying for the same promotion. They are put in an aircraft hanger with three hundred pasty white executive arses bent over. Whoever kisses them all first will get the promotion. The only possible outcome is that while the woman puts together a task force to determine relative worth of such a method and consider less demeaning alternatives, the man is halfway down the line, puckering up to every cheek and slipping his business card in every crack.
Re: Another Date by Dovina	Prince of Void 80.71.122.138	8-Aug-07/12:16 PM
Well we are all dreamers Looking for what we dreamed yesterday But we don’t know We drag them all through tomorrows Where the reality seems too real The worst thing is we can't reach Those unreachable dreams Our passions never stop us That last in tears of our uncertainty Why we couldn’t...How it could happen The destiny became stranger than our lives We live with things unsaid and unsound Rising and falling down Here in our hearts The ocean has no depth No end ....no destination We are wandering along our dreams Our roads ...our days... But the point is you must devote yourself for someone or some reasons I know it's hard...or maybe impossible Devotions give your choices how you can change One day impossible is possible There are so many ways to go You can discover on your own Can I ask you? What are important things you like about a man?
Re: I love you by jerzeygirl22	pete 62.56.62.221	8-Aug-07/4:36 PM
the first stanza here swings along real nice but then the poetry (not necessarily the poetic thoughts) seems to dry up.try the rest using the meter of that ... maybe even let the first stanza stand by itself ... the fewer words, the more a poem can say .:-)
Re: Prescription of Pain by Miggy	pete 62.56.62.221	8-Aug-07/4:40 PM
a point for "chirp"
regarding some deleted poem...	pete 62.56.62.221	8-Aug-07/4:43 PM
you seemed such a nice sensitive guy too . aaahh ...( sigh)....
regarding some deleted poem...	pete 62.56.62.221	8-Aug-07/4:44 PM
oh..bluddyell
Re: Sunset Beach by amanda_dcosta	pete 62.56.62.221	8-Aug-07/4:45 PM
puh..leeze
Re: Caprice by PoetryIsDead	dclark 67.140.205.248	8-Aug-07/7:28 PM
i don't get the last line either, but like you said it makes since to you, and thats all that really matters in actuality. i like how i can read it smoothly without to much rhyming and not to little, but i don't like rhyming words like smile and mile, but thats all up to you, i just stick with more of the vowels sounding out the same at the end of lines, or sometimes without.
Re: Sadist by PoetryIsDead	dclark 67.140.205.248	8-Aug-07/7:29 PM
reminds me of sex, maybe? a little brutal ;)
Re: Aeuphoria by MacFrantic	dclark 67.140.205.248	8-Aug-07/7:41 PM
maybe change thunder to rumble, that rhymes to simple, stick with the vowels they drag it out better, ya know?
Re: Under the rain by Prince of Void	Dovina 67.118.32.133	8-Aug-07/7:53 PM
One of your best.
Re: Prescription of Pain by Miggy	Dental Panic 84.27.244.4	10-Aug-07/1:33 PM
yeah, chirp is great. Sounds like Bush talkin' bout Yurp.
Re: broken bottles by richa	Edna Sweetlove 85.211.248.120	13-Aug-07/9:07 AM
I really cannot see this is very good and I dislike the excessive use of exclamation marks.
Re: Crotchety Old Geezer by Dovina	INTRANSIT 65.29.52.204	14-Aug-07/8:03 AM
That he does. That he does.
regarding some deleted poem...	INTRANSIT 65.29.52.204	14-Aug-07/8:05 AM
Better than the other boss/employee poem.
Re: Grafton Street Late Joys by Engelbert Humpalot	colin douglas's arse 194.154.22.38	14-Aug-07/8:11 AM
Good one, Engelbert.
regarding some deleted poem...	xxx 67.172.190.253	14-Aug-07/5:32 PM
snort chuckle 'blows nose' tosses tissue
Re: We're Off by Skamper	Edna Sweetlove 85.211.236.120	15-Aug-07/7:57 AM
Straightener and placaten'er is a stunning rhyme. The rest is a bit ordinary though. The last 2 stanzas need to go down the toilet.