Re: fa11ing by Bill Z Bub	19-Dec-02/2:04 PM
Could it be 'just before the fall'? This is the best thing I've seen so far besides Tori's 'I can't see New York'. Your masculinity always comes through in your poems, dustchoked and mangled. Glistening is a strong hopefilled word. You have tremendous promise. If I could give you a gift, it would be all the right accidents.
Re: UltraSound by UnityMitford	19-Dec-02/1:53 PM
I don't get it. Great title.
Re: of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	19-Dec-02/3:30 AM
Lovely. Get rid of the last 2 lines in the first stanza. I love your poem. i posted just for you.
Re: no cure by New Life Drug	19-Dec-02/3:17 AM
Forget selfess, that's not in question. Will you be selfish? That's what everybody wants to know, especially you.
Re: joyriding by Bill Z Bub	19-Dec-02/3:12 AM
'Your skeptical chin once brought down religion in morning's first class fomenting rebellion behind bullet-proof glass.'
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/4:16 PM
Oh ==Doylum, I most willfully misuse everything. It's my downfall, it's my charm. I am omnipresent while at the same time being totally unawares.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/4:12 PM
Yuo know when I left the first time you said you were sorry to see me go and you wished I would come back. So I did. Now things are worse then ever. I mean I've been through so much shit but this, this is just crazy. I just want to write poetry and read some poetry. You don't have to defen d yourself, you don't have to attack me. This really hurts, and the sad things is I don't know why. Maybe I'm just seeking abuse because it's what I'm use to, it's what's familiar. I 'm trying very hard at this point to be civil and to be kind and to be understood. Please stop attacking me, it's so unnecessary what do you have to prove? Stop putting me down, stop teasing me, stop enbroiling me in your war.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/4:03 PM
I'm trying very hard to make sense of all this. I'm sure we are all guilty of exactly the same crimes. You come across as narrow minded, I come across as some tart who wears her tits on her sleeve. Neither is true. Both are true. Again I'm not arguing with you. All I'm say ing is it sounds like you and Horus have a date to beat each other up and I don't want to be there. I don't know what's really going on because I haven't been around. I tried to drop the ball but you picked it up and threw it back at me. I admire so many many things, so many things, I don't always agree with anyone. I don't take sides. I don't want to look at ridiculous comments. I surrender ok? Take the flag take the hill take the spoils. I'm a sweet woman, I have nothing to disagree with you about. I don't care either way, please stop.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/3:54 PM
Did I call you pretentious? That's just my word du jour. We are all pretentious fucks. Anyway you are not who you think you are, you are not even who I think you are, but what's worst of all, I am not who you think you are, I am just some silly girl trying to make it.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/3:43 PM
Listen, I don't know you, but he can kick some ass, take my word for it. He's crazy. I don't know who Stan Rice is so I don't get the reference. You present yourself as morbidly narrow minded. I'm not "stuck" anywhere though the playground might not be so bad. I'm not arguing with you. Why would I ever want to hold you? You killed that remember? Why would I ever want to be where you and Jeremi are fighting each other?
Re: The Party by blkarak	17-Dec-02/3:36 PM
I like this poem despite it's flaws. The ending is weak. The body, overweight.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/3:26 PM
What on earth are you talking about? I said we are all poseurs. You are hard to swallow PAKI, but you like it that way. The world has always been ending; Carbon made always wants to be unmade. He'll kick your ass, I wouldn't if I we're you. I don't want to watch, and you don't want me to hold you. You've forgotten how to learn. Your whispers carry a heavy debt, like mustard gas.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/3:11 PM
I haven't heard til now. Do you eat lots of oatmeal?
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/2:58 PM
Again Intransit, the second stanza has so much heart, and the word 'little' carries the scent of indearnment; study just seems to stern an introduction. You're the only one who knows the truth. I don't like Boston Market as a rule, but they make a hell of a creamed spinach, with anice Chardonnay it's quite the meal.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/2:40 PM
I'm not saying the question is necessarily the best idea, but I liked it more than what he changed it to. The current stanza feels stoic and purely academic, like I'm in class and the teacher's asking me to pay attention. It doesn't work for me with respect to the idea behind the poem. I think there is a better alternative, What do you think?
Re: I Can Write A Wrong, But I Can't Right A Poem by horus8	17-Dec-02/2:34 PM
I have to bring you my copy of PLAY WITHOUT A TITLE by GarciaLorca. Don't let me forget. You always know how.
Re: Misplaced admoration by deep-as-a-puddle	17-Dec-02/2:29 PM
Your poem has been fataly wounded by rhyme.
Re: a comment on of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/2:25 PM
I liked the question better than what you changed it to.
Re: of people and places (final cut)I by INTRANSIT	17-Dec-02/2:24 PM
Theecond stanza's beautiful. I almost wish you could leave out the last stanza, but something needs to be said. could you come up with a metaphor? What were you looking at/thinking of when you wrote this?
Re: a comment on fire by bxjay170	17-Dec-02/2:20 PM
In fact it may be argued that we are the only animals who question the morality/immorality of killing.