on Unsung American Dream by SupremeDreamer
27 Jul 2007, 1:43 PM
Had to change the rather long and redundant title... Title still sorta sucks... any ideas anyone? Fuck it with a steel dildo in intellectual anathema.
maybe i tucked you in there
i never did look
i substituted you for other songs
--I think you should cut out the 'I's-:
might have tucked you in there..
never did look, substituted you
for other songs
---
Just a suggestion. I'm just biased against the word I.. that and when it's used repeditivly it rings of anathema going super nova in my rectum.
Blessed with an eight.
i never did look
i substituted you for other songs
--I think you should cut out the 'I's-:
might have tucked you in there..
never did look, substituted you
for other songs
---
Just a suggestion. I'm just biased against the word I.. that and when it's used repeditivly it rings of anathema going super nova in my rectum.
Blessed with an eight.
on some deleted poem
28 Jul 2007, 2:07 PM
-Fart-
I'm sorry, did your rectal drip return? Or was that mine? I do notice a bit of shit dripping off your Gandalf inspired beard... Ah well, all is lost during a night of heavy alcohol consumption and self-loathing, is it not?
I'm sorry, did your rectal drip return? Or was that mine? I do notice a bit of shit dripping off your Gandalf inspired beard... Ah well, all is lost during a night of heavy alcohol consumption and self-loathing, is it not?
on Caprice by PoetryIsDead
3 Aug 2007, 12:13 PM
The last line is a little confusing to me.
Blessed with seven.
Blessed with seven.
on some deleted poem
3 Aug 2007, 12:20 PM
Marching towards my death.
I'd much prefer this ending, simply because you, sir, are already Old with extreme Age. :)
I'd much prefer this ending, simply because you, sir, are already Old with extreme Age. :)
on All tonight wandering along in the broken dreams by Prince of Void
3 Aug 2007, 12:22 PM
If your going to do this sort of shit, why not do it better than the classic pimple cliche piece?
Blessed with one.
Blessed with one.
on some deleted poem
3 Aug 2007, 12:29 PM
The second line has 8 syllables. Cut out the 'I' and you will have seven as required (alone = 2 syllables). Capitalize 'I' in the third line. Also, this isn't really a Haiku in the traditional imagery sense.
blessed with four.
blessed with four.
on some deleted poem
3 Aug 2007, 12:31 PM
Mispelled Occasions in the title.
on some deleted poem
3 Aug 2007, 12:32 PM
The title is shit. You should have titled it "Poetry".
Or even better: "Rockmages Poetry"!!
Or even better: "Rockmages Poetry"!!
on Eroticism by Prince of Void
3 Aug 2007, 12:41 PM
Can you be more inorganic?
on The Occasional Love by SomeNewKill
3 Aug 2007, 12:46 PM
breath = breathe? Also, this whole thing is confused. Many aspects of this poem reminds me of pimples. Though slightly more matured than the average pimple, it still possesses puss.
Blessed with a two.
Blessed with a two.
on some deleted poem
15 Aug 2007, 8:42 PM
Hmm. Eight.
Even though I thoroughly enjoy Bukowskis work.
Even though I thoroughly enjoy Bukowskis work.
on Baggage (3rd ending) by INTRANSIT
10 Sep 2007, 2:10 PM
Humorous.
on Pulling the hill (formerly-in response to) by INTRANSIT
11 Sep 2007, 12:08 PM
I can sympathize in some respects, old friend. Eight. Oh, and don't mind the bearded orangutan; rockmage hasn't yet learned that throwing his feces about is considered uncouth in polite company.
on some deleted poem
22 Sep 2007, 10:55 AM
Delete my comments eh will you? You little Snot. This is cliche CRAP. And horrendously corny. Zero.
on some deleted poem
22 Sep 2007, 10:57 AM
Oh, btw, when you vote for yourself, you make it apparent that you're really fucking gay.
on Coyote, The City, and Some Moon by Shardik
27 Sep 2007, 1:52 PM
Hmm.
Naturally, of course, your also a strong supporter of the politically correct movement, [PCM- a.k.a: Putrid Cock Mongers.] since you happily zeroed two pieces of mine- one which dealt with golden showers and the other which made use of the word "nigger".
In short, sir- or rather should I say Child? You are a dullard who is found wanting. To me, you are the beetle I found crushed beneath my Jesus sandled feet.
Good-day. Blessed with zero.
[BTW: If it will assuage your puny ego, you can go ahead and zero bomb my whole collection if you like. Just remember to scream in bloody ecstasy "Hail Rockmage!!" each time you click submit with your molested shit-c-licker.]