Ok GW I always comment 'lightly' for fear of your superiority which is why my comments are always vague offering you know suggestions for that reason. I have a few here can i tell you ?

didnt kind of have the flow, bit too predictable. -5-

inspirational , nice re-write -10

Your a true wordsmith BZB

This is one of your more angry pieces, i have awaoke to smell your nicaraguan coffee beans and the aroma will linger for quite some time. Liked where you were going with this,but leave Zeta Jones out of it ....HELLO ! -9

Fantastico ! but I think line 2 contradicts insomnia ?

You have all your male chromosomes shining like icicles in the setting sun, for B movie appreciation you gotta read dark angels 'zombie flesh eaters' its a f***g party. -9-

You have all your male chromosomes shining like icicles in the setting sun, for B movie appreciation you gotta read dark angels 'zombie flesh eaters' its a f***g party. -9-

where for art thou 'mollusc king'? will there be more of that?

an epic as usual but the 1st one of yours I took time to read and t'was worth the scrolling

apply your mask each day
to mimic every face in the sea
all you are is a pattern
carved out of your own misery

**best thing i read all day

I could really understand where you were coming from with this, its very good I like the point it makes about us all being 'fabric cyborgs' on the road to success with a free stopover at a town called failure. We do immerse ourselves in the plasma screens of misery and repetitiveness. This is groundhog day of pain, a head on collision resulting from death on the international highway on the road to hell, a million and one things can be said, sad very sad state of existence and you said it very well -10-

This was well worth reading your writing is rich in imagination, and there i was expecting something crap (your title isn't alluring like the poem) *9*

nice poem but couldn't link what the title had to do with any of it.

I do like this poem and its never easy writing of spiritual, religious and secular subjects, whats interested me here is that you've interwoven a story of you and christ and i can see a lot of pain in it, the last line would benefit challice instead of cup. Also the last stanza confuses me 'in 3 days time i'll step free of the pain, please explain this to me.
I am a reluctant atheist and want to connect with this poem you've written.
By the way GW whats YOUR favourite poem you have written?

better than the others you've written this at least show in bits that you have the seeds. -5-

full of angst but it does show your naivity with life experience of relationships

I imagined Olivier reading this with a skull in his hand, not a bad effort

iT CAN ACTUALLY BE INTERPRETED EACH WAY ON A 2ND PERUSAL, STOLEN SLEEP CAN BE SLEEPING OR NOT BEING ABLE TO

Quite Beautiful, you old romantic.
worthy of a 9