Re: a comment on Death of a Drug Addict by SupremeDreamer	SupremeDreamer 130.65.109.104	12-Mar-08/3:12 PM
Transexual dykes such as yourself make it difficult for anyone to breathe, you ugly, pretentious, pompous wench.
Re: a comment on Absurd Robot by Nepanthe	Nepanthe 99.239.241.239	12-Mar-08/5:39 AM
You are self actualizing, each of your steps are exacting, yours is a limited pace in which you know your place. I can mean anyone can't it? Except the people that the words don't apply to. By saying I, I do not distract the listener from my presence which would make them more aware of me, I is easier to empathize with as it is all of our positions in life.
Re: a comment on Deep Midnight Blues by oneglove	oneglove 71.79.52.193	12-Mar-08/5:18 AM
no. that question makes absolutely no sense.
Re: a comment on Goodnight by Nepanthe	Nepanthe 99.239.241.239	12-Mar-08/5:09 AM
http://www.myspace.com/monstersinnocence It's the first song currently, I already see that retreating needs to be changed to receding. I have changed "Wave all that I will...." to "Thrash all that I will, I'm stuck in my place". If you have anymore insight as to improving the lyrics after listening please tell me.
Re: HATE ME, LOVE by alvinb	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:42 AM
instead of writing a poorly drafted suicide note, why not write about the story behind what when wrong, that would be 100 times more interesting.
Re: Deep Midnight Blues by oneglove	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:37 AM
any song that starts with lord oh lord and i tune out immediately. and if he is toiling until his fingers bleed, shouldn't that mean the days are as long as the nights?
Re: Waiting to fall by aliena	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:34 AM
good effort, seems a little disjunctive though. i'm tuned out by some of the cliche words "agony", "inferno", "illicit desire". i like lines 4-9. maybe go into why you lie, sign, can't cry though instead of just saying it. paint the picture so the audience understands, otherwise it's something people can't connect to. i suggest getting some sort of modern anthology on poetry, read it, repeat. i think the goal is that you want the audience to feel something that touches them through a descriptive story of pretty words.
Re: Radio Scan by Blindproject217	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:28 AM
I like it a lot. But I don't get why the denial will help the character sleep.
Re: Goodnight by Nepanthe	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:24 AM
i like "of all things arms can do with grace" a lot. the rest of the song, eh. maybe i just need to hear it.
Re: Light show by winniss	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:22 AM
there could be something good here, maybe a couple more stanzas would help to flush it out.
Re: The Things We Wear by jessicazee	Dark Angle 68.96.82.200	12-Mar-08/1:21 AM
i like the poem, good images, don't really see what it's saying though, thematically, maybe i'm just not trying hard enough.
Re: Light show by winniss	Dovina 12.22.108.229	11-Mar-08/3:34 PM
ok, nice rhythm, ok rhyme. What's the point?
Re: The Things We Wear by jessicazee	Dovina 12.22.108.229	11-Mar-08/3:32 PM
"red rain dress" is a wonderment, maybe like me, you just walk a lot and get wet. "worm elastic" is cute. That hat wont help against rain. S4 is strange, and strangely punctuated. S5 pulls it together, except the tag is again, strange.
Re: Absurd Robot by Nepanthe	jessicazee 24.160.246.73	10-Mar-08/11:58 PM
Make it less about you (i.e. "I") and let someone else dance to a cosmic beat. Love it. 9.
Re: In Limbo by Christof	jessicazee 24.160.246.73	10-Mar-08/11:57 PM
Sticky thud/hammer stuns. Totally.
Re: Radio Scan by Blindproject217	jessicazee 24.160.246.73	10-Mar-08/11:56 PM
I dig this. But check your punctuation...i.e. "I'll (line 11), it's (13), that's (14), it's (16), etc., and a few typos ("all the little things that I made me leave"). Dang, I'm a nitpicky editor monster now, but I only take the time because with some editing you've got something here. 8.
Re: The Young Girl From Khartoum by Edna Sweetlove	alvinb 122.52.99.32	4-Mar-08/10:16 PM
Do your twat really smells bad???
Re: Death of a Drug Addict by SupremeDreamer	Edna Sweetlove 85.211.254.47	28-Feb-08/6:59 AM
You are not fit to breathe. The only website where the horsedung you excrete might be found amusing is http://poetryaddicts.pcriot.com/forum where everyone else is also a total cunt.
Re: Sitting Alone by Edna Sweetlove	SupremeDreamer 130.65.109.104	26-Feb-08/1:52 PM
Lesbian manhater poetry? What utter rubbish. You smell like someones embrowned poop deck.
Re: San Franscisco by John Rambo	Edna Sweetlove 85.211.243.133	25-Feb-08/6:38 PM
This is a lovely poem. I think you should post it at another website I sometimes go to: http://poetryaddicts.pcriot.com/forum/ - it would be much loved there as indeed would you.....