Dovina
on A daisy chain for Nina by Caducus
18 Nov 2005, 5:26 PM
If she married you in 82, why are you, as man, a widow in 83? Lesbians, or do you mean widower?
Good, except for the mundane last line.
I like the cousinship of man and devil, the take on the swine and Legion, mosquitoe/bug, Legion/prophet, and the waiting cross. The () seem distracting and could be done without I think.
I say this only because poemranker has corrupted me: "Sounds gay."
A jingle has rhythm, usually rhyme, and carries a simple theme. A love letter conveys affection. This carries: don't shake the baby???
Permit yourself to do such a dasterdly act only if you wish boycot. If you want to get rid of a scroungy poem because I made you feel bad about it, then please delete it. If you want to post a new poem, then post it. It's not like you post every two days and need to squeeze another in edgewise. Gees!
Hardly, would I write about less than importance.
You speak, no doubt, of a super man, whom women long for, gush on, then nurse in his paralyzed state til death do us part. Thank you, but your basic binary man, enhanced with compassionate software, outperforms in the end.
Yes. And please read my answer carefully, paying particular attention to the question.
I'd hate to give a long thoughtful reply here where Dancing Shamrock will likely soon delete it. I love when you say, "You'll probably answer . . ." because I can usually do just that and fully justify it by one of the various twists offered. But in this case you do not understand bnecause you are not bound by reason.
I would not trust a man so arogant as to say he trumps. Such a man has not learned the contentment of not knowing. - Dovina
Considering the varying results, it made for a worthwhile experiment. I'd give it a 1 or 10 depending on my mood. Right now I'm kinda numb so no vote yet.
I'd probably give it a five or a six. Cute gimmick.
I'd like to know what you honestly think of your poem.
I think a poem has to stand on its up-front understandability, so for the purposes of rating it--if you don't understand it, trash it. That's honest. That's how much value the poem has _for you_.
But just to satisfy any curiousity you might have, read it as morse code.
cursed, I tell you--cursed!
You probably won't see this but this is like a blend of two of my favorite poets. E.A. Poe and Benny Hill.
Kilkenny? Southpark?
The poem's a classic or should be.
First: Does that ability to echoe word sounds, not rhyme but echoe certain qualities in words together come naturally or is it more of a hair pulling event.
Because this one comes out so damn natural.
Second: Love how you snuck "bore" in.
Third: I bet you're leaning towards the bug being Jesus. I was.
Forth: There's a current political spin to this one, intended or not.
I could spend all day peeling back layers of this poem.
A sign of a great artwork. You really shouldn't give some of these away for free.
And if you could, seeing christmas is near, throw me another story or two. Hap is a hero deserving of a sequel.
I've gotten lazy about poetry music recently. For my best (and only link) check here:
http://www.poemranker.com/poem-details.j
This, unsurprisingly, is exactly what everyone always says about nentwined. That's his gift and curse.