I guess under that metaphor I could say I have Irritable bowel syndrome. Few can match him turd for turd. You came as close as anyone.

Not bad. Billy Collins isn't awful, but didn't deserve to be US Poet Laureate. I imagine some educated people made a big list of poets who hadn't criticized the war yet, and W just picked the one from Texas.

I guess under that metaphor I could say I suffer from Irritable bowel syndrome. Have you ever been accused of being DA P.I.?

Most Windows operating systems come with MS word and unless you change it's settings it will capitalize the first letter of every line. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Have you read "Niether Snow"? I like it. It reminds me of driving in Pennsylvania.

Out of curiosity, what term do you use most often in normal conversation? In writing?

I've been reading a poetry anthology edited by Billy Collins where he (Billy) capitalizes the first words of lines I know weren't capitalized in their originals. It is a little off-putting. Seems like most poets I read do capitalize occasional poems, but nowhere near consistently. I think it's mainly a problem for people who aren't used to reading through enjambment.

This sucks. You can't hold a metaphor straight for an entire line, but I'm getting called on inconsistent disses?

I got "God turned his head," but yours is better. Also, leave "sin" on the end of line 3. AlChemy: If he's right on line 4, change it. The second stanza is perfect, both translated and not.

I warn you, it may star Jeff Bridges. In which case it won't make any money anyway, and everyone should just pirate it.

I do know the show and remember the song, which plays over a scene where the hero levitates using aerosol cans, among other things.

Who's sensitive? All the Western women I know are well-adjusted and untroubled about things like whether they should be more or less feminine in the workplace. None of them think that, as far as the West goes, either sex dominates things; nor would they be able to say what either sex would dominate if it did. It's nice. We drink a lot and play Scategories. You're the ones who seem conflicted about things.

Almost perfect. Line 8 is slightly different but I like your interpretation. Your line 7 and 3 is missing one word. Otherwise some damn impressive deduction on your part.

Correction: The mystery lady did use perfume after washing his feet with tears and drying them with her hair.

I thought it was with tears she anointed his feet and I don't think the original says if that was Mary Magdalene or not. It does say he cured Magdalene of evil spirits and infirmities. Pretty much all the Gospels are purported. The Gnostics were the Spocks of the Christian sects, all about logic. I think its great that Mary's Gospel is the most logic based. It's a good message to women. To not let emotions fog your thinking. How can you not adore her now? She's an elevated version of you. The idea of a married Christ was done much better, much more original and much more feasibly in The Last Temptation of Christ. I think Dan Brown has more respect for cheap gimmicks than for women. I hope to see the rise of the church of St. Mary Magdalene. http://magdalene.wise1.com/

It seems out-of-chaacter with the Mary Magdeline in the four usually-accepted Gospels. There, she poured expensive purfume on Jesus' feet and wiped them with her hair. In this purported Gospel, she is philosophizing like some elevated Dovina. As for having a sense of validation in the Bible, I might find it easire to imagine being part of the Bride of Christ than most men do. And I think Jesus treated women of his day with more respect than the average man did.