Re: The Book of Images by Dovina	Glasseyez 204.49.132.59	9-Feb-06/9:38 PM
I really like this one
Re: Dear Dad, Dear Mom, Dear Me by Miggy	drnick 24.176.22.254	9-Feb-06/9:49 PM
Wow...this is really bad. Come on, man, I know you're better than this. These sound like country-pop lyrics, and that music is for the musically retarded. Try to not be so obvious with what you're talking about, or say something profound if you do want to be direct.
Re: Do Something by Miggy	drnick 24.176.22.254	9-Feb-06/9:55 PM
Hey, I think you might be getting it...this could be a lot better, but the SUBJECT is a massive improvement. Thus I will give you a 5.
Re: Static by wilco	drnick 24.176.22.254	9-Feb-06/10:00 PM
This makes me salivate it's so good. I'd like to point out what I really like about this, but it would be every single line. I try very hard not to give out 10s, but this is perfect. "And the best radio station in town is nothing but static And the heartbreaking hum of the road is soft and erratic." -genius.
Re: Memoirs of a Greasyslut the rest of the story by Glasseyez	some deleted user 204.49.132.59	9-Feb-06/10:05 PM
hahaha funny
Re: My testament to free speech by Glasseyez	some deleted user 204.49.132.59	9-Feb-06/10:08 PM
Our views could compare 9
Re: Divorcing Tennessee by Dovina	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.37	9-Feb-06/10:10 PM
Dovina, I think I have read this earlier. I might not have appreciated this much...more because I am not familiar with the American setting. but now it makes more sense to me. It is written from the heart and gives a sense of wanting it back. I think I owe you a 10 for this.... and I'm glad I didn't vote earlier.
Re: Everything That You've Ever Wanted by drnick	Zoetrope 172.153.211.78	9-Feb-06/10:40 PM
don't be so hard on yourself--the imagery isn't bad. Neither is the poem.
regarding some deleted poem...	Zoetrope 172.153.211.78	9-Feb-06/10:42 PM
Kind of treacly.
Re: The Acorn Daisies by MacFrantic	Zoetrope 172.153.211.78	9-Feb-06/10:45 PM
Not sure I know what "acorn daisies" are, but this is pretty good. Like the last couple of lines, especially.
Re: My Father’s World by Dovina	Zoetrope 172.153.211.78	9-Feb-06/10:50 PM
"I proudly showed one too" is pretty good. "A canvas tarp on his shoulder heaved" is a little tortured though. There are a lot of things you could rhyme with leaves without flipping the "heaved" line. Would a working class guy who uses words like gumption know that unction means ointment? seems like a funny word to use.
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	Ranger 62.252.32.15	10-Feb-06/6:02 AM
Okay...although this is too long for me to read in one sitting (have a lecture shortly) I skim-read it and liked what I saw. I shall return later for a more detailed synopsis.
regarding some deleted poem...	Ranger 62.252.32.15	10-Feb-06/6:13 AM
'Blonde waves' I like, and the final two lines are excellent. I'd like to know a bit more about the woman though, her description is a bit brief at the moment. Maybe two more lines would do it.
regarding some deleted poem...	Bluemonkey 170.141.68.2	10-Feb-06/9:14 AM
ha
regarding some deleted poem...	some deleted user 204.97.18.26	10-Feb-06/9:53 AM
Great imagery!
Re: Going Away to Fight a War by wilco	Glasseyez 204.49.132.34	10-Feb-06/10:42 AM
Its great the way you explain the life of a soldier
regarding some deleted poem...	Alizarin_Crimson 71.131.189.202	10-Feb-06/11:46 AM
Danielle Steel.
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	god'swife 71.103.105.208	10-Feb-06/11:52 AM
You're a hell of a writer. I'm currently suffering from a tremendous case of writer's block. And the interesting thing is I came on to this sight about 2 weeks ago to get some help. The last time I was really productive was around 3 years ago when I first sign on to this Poet's asylum. Very serendipitis. This is long but it still reads like poetry.
Re: Moonlight Paradox Riddle Answered by Glasseyez	Ranger 62.252.32.15	10-Feb-06/11:57 AM
I guessed the bit about 'I Am' (eimi ei) so can I have a bonus point?
Re: Everything That You've Ever Wanted by drnick	god'swife 71.103.105.208	10-Feb-06/12:11 PM
I read this yesterday and didn't know exactly what bothered me about it. I like this poem, and I love the title, but there are a few thiings you possibly could make better. For example; elope means to runaway, yes, but for the majority it means to runaway with & get married so it kinda confuses things at the start. baby's pillows? Are they softer than children or adult pillows? In the 7th line you move from the sea and moonlight to enourmous atoms. Maybe a break in stanza would give it a much needed segue.