| Re: Snack for the Shameless by New Life Drug |
9-Oct-02/8:28 AM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
9-Oct-02/8:30 AM |
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i am moved, and entertained. thank you.
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| Re: Haiku by heart |
9-Oct-02/8:32 AM |
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would be better if the first line had more 'rigid cadence'.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
9-Oct-02/8:34 AM |
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sounds more lyric than free verse
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| Re: song of the birds by rainbow |
9-Oct-02/8:36 AM |
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how is this a song of birds? sounds more like a diary entry of a teenage girl who needs to get out and live a little.
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| Re: The Thought Of It by Christof |
10-Oct-02/1:42 PM |
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christof, you are honed razor sharp these days. i bled, reading this.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:21 AM |
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why do we let them possess us so? why aren't they the ones begging us to come home? the irony of the begging queen. you paint it true, because you have lived it.
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| Re: more{Porn*Star}{Hai*kus} by horus8 |
11-Oct-02/7:22 AM |
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you are a naughty boy and you deserve to be spanked. have a 9. you'll have to get the 6 yourself.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:24 AM |
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this is pretty jaunty for the demise of your one true love. did you even think about the function of form when you composed this fun little lyric?
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:25 AM |
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~* love the sparkles, babe. never change, k? *~
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:40 AM |
the blue curtains is a nice image. when the heart has always been empty, one does not feel it as keenly as after it has been full. before love, the everyday things reside in there; perhaps the curtains will go blood red once love has come.
this poem falls back on over-examined artifice. can you keep with the novelty of the first line, and run with that? weave a metaphor; i have seen so many confessions, and this one is not unique.
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| Re: SO by Nicholas Jones |
11-Oct-02/7:48 AM |
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so. surreal. and concrete. and metal and blood and plastic and steam and vision. and haze. thorough.
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| Re: Bowstones, 21st June 200 by Nicholas Jones |
11-Oct-02/7:50 AM |
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please do stick with this, and steer clear of politics. you are so fucking good at sense of place.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:54 AM |
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i really do like the metaphors in this. it reads like a well-loved volume left behind on a bench...and i could not make it my own, but i will possess it for a time bfore i set it free.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:56 AM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/7:59 AM |
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silver, who puts a fence INSIDE? think before you write, man.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/8:01 AM |
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i think you should post work that is your own
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Oct-02/8:04 AM |
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"To know for certain poetry does exist." and lives. and breathes. and grows. good work, mrs.g.
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| Re: Football by Tom Colebrooke |
14-Oct-02/7:41 AM |
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only a mere smackerel for me, roo
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| Re: Snow-White by vulcan |
14-Oct-02/8:01 AM |
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my carp could conquer your sole any day. with his fins tied behind his back, even.
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