| Re: Child of my Buttocks by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. |
1-Nov-02/2:42 PM |
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for tortured english, 4 pts, for sheer effort, 2 pts, for making me laugh hard at the state of mind you must have had to get yourself into to write it, 4 more pts for a total of 10
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| Re: The Sea by Tarquin De La Bog |
15-Aug-02/3:29 PM |
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| Re: The War by Tarquin De La Bog |
15-Aug-02/3:27 PM |
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if this is a war, why are there adoring crowds, i didn't know war was a spectator sport..anyway first half was better than the second, like the other comment said..i gives you a 5
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| Re: Eleemosynary for the undeserving but forward foreigner by ErgoErgun |
18-Jul-02/3:31 PM |
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| Re: uh oh by evergreen |
14-Jul-02/12:22 PM |
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Excellent! At least there was only one other pair of eyes :)
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| Re: Currents by Isis |
12-Jul-02/7:01 PM |
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Isis, the last 7 lines are wonderful! The first line "a deep of tear"? is odd, and struggling and yielding may be what you want to say, but it is not apparent why opposites are in consecutive lines. Overall very good work, I love the imagery of the dark and light, it brings up an image of jail bars. Thanks!
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| Re: remembering you by sapphire_rain7 |
11-Jul-02/8:41 PM |
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i like the atmosphere you have created...i wonder is there a way to convey how you got so close but not close enough? Is the regret that you convey so well just the result of a chance death or decisions made?
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| Re: Love Obsession (the stalker's song) by evergreen |
11-Jul-02/7:53 PM |
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don't understand 'make you stand next to me' and also i'm the only one who knows how to die for you? doesn't fit with making you scream..but then i've never been a stalker so I don't know how they think :)
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