regarding some deleted poem...	16-Jan-03/1:49 AM
This could blow me away but some of the lines are far too gay. I have put them below and highlighted in CAPS the words that annotyed me. I really want to be selfish and for you to do a version for me coz other than those lines i liked this. *************************** this mysterious TREAT. The sky ABOVE CAN BE DARK AND GREY, but this flower IS SO BEAUTIFUL, it will LIGHT UP ANY DAY.
regarding some deleted poem...	16-Jan-03/2:00 AM
I have some ideas, when you say dark and grey sky, it is not really very imaginative so say something like 'Skylines of sorrow will be sunshine tomorrow' thats still gay isn't it? just get rid of those lines or I wont sleep tonight, I'll be rude to everyone and it will be all your fault, just try and give those lines more oommph, e.g you could say 'the sky is red' or you could say...the sky was drowning in its sun scorched plasma clouds, its got more je ne sais qui , I've just drank 3 cups of costa rican and eaten a mars bar so i'm going coz i'm pissing myself off and must begin the self mutilation.
regarding some deleted poem...	16-Jan-03/2:03 AM
On the poem its not your best to be honest but you score a 6, even your less impounding works are not bad
regarding some deleted poem...	16-Jan-03/2:17 AM
If I was single I'd ask you out to skim some stones across a bay of crying seagulls and rip my heart open so you could see your reflection. This is so beautiful, and so are you, this has made me feel hopeful, happy, sad, complex, Horus would love this i'm sure ^10^
Re: blues by <~>	18-Jan-03/1:31 AM
IS this about how beautiful things appear until you take a closer look at them and your overwhelmed? or have i made a prat of myself? If not it is how it could be interpreted, my bro scitz agrees.
Re: Jingoism saved the wingnut by horus8	18-Jan-03/2:01 AM
Very original horus, what I liked about this was the munificence of description especially in the opening. Do you write many concretes? . I have to say the line 'God works on his tan whilst sipping margaritas made me stop reading for a moment and imagine the lazy sod sitting by a poolside with mafia angels dicussing how to waste lucifer because 'he has no respect'. Also the soft star lip brush line was neat, One minor criticism was that it had to fucking end. If your gonna turn this into music you'll have to send me a copy-seriously i might whisper a few of these lines to my beau later in bed and say to her 'call me horus baby' your work is diverse and this is up there with the other one you spent quality time on about africa ***9 and three quarters***
Re: The last day of an old year by poetandknowit	23-Jan-03/2:21 AM
I liked this the 1st time I read it and voted 10 heres that vote again, I will however study not glance your work from now now on. (my work is less demanding), we've had our differences but I respect you.
Re: Mystery by Katie2	23-Jan-03/2:40 AM
Raw piece, well done some striking images here and a good opening, last line dont work for me though-8
Re: Jesus was a necromancer by horus8	23-Jan-03/5:36 AM
In every mosque, in every church i can smell the effigys of horus burning (even then we can feel the warmth, see the light) as muslims would say....ahh this is bloody lovely innit, My brother scitz hates haikus but he liked this one, horus your a naughty naughty boy. *9*
Re: Snowblind by horus8	24-Jan-03/4:59 AM
Very cool. hey Horus this reminds me of Jim Morrissons poetry you should read it, this is in the same vein (retinal vein that is) *9*
Re: one moment to the other by nentwined	27-Jan-03/8:40 AM
todays best
regarding some deleted poem...	27-Jan-03/8:42 AM
Heartfelt but not not heart wrenching, cliched in parts. 6
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Jan-03/8:42 AM
I'm beginning to like you, I wrote something angry with serious overtones of hell called 'exiting darkness' hell offers a warmer welcome dont you think? Good poem I have liked yours so far which is a compliment considering my foul mood today*7*
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Jan-03/8:51 AM
***fuck me your near perfect**** this is your finest hour GW, and this stanza made the down on my arms ignite. Whatever anyone ever says about you remember this you were born to write, born to teach and like a firefly show us ragged hopeless moths the light to better writing. Your beautiful, today i am in love with you. ====I am better than Any treasure. I am The promise of it. ------bling bling wicked----
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Jan-03/9:08 AM
Reading this again, I do believe this should be published because their are so many anagrams within this poem, you could make 3 or 4 haiku's out of all the stanzas, its also flexible it can mean different things to different people some it has intended meanings and other things you write of in here are open for the reader to interpret how they want to, their are endless definitions to the presented metaphors, you tell me to read shakespeare GW, I think when i get my own computer i will learn a lot from you and to think you have inspired me to write something inspired from this tonight that will be on ranker for others to criticize / praise. In years from now you will read all the 100s of comments you have had and think 'Shit I was a damn good writer' and thats why you should submit this for publication because every blue moon i will read something that inspires me and their are only 3 poems that have made me realize why i love poetry so much so you, tintagiles and Intransit are now people who have written something that has truly inspired me, I have always been accused of being stoical and having a dark soul, I HAD to tell you all this because that is our gold, our currency as a writer is knowing that the tears of trees we write on have more beauty with poetry like this on than any songbird or Maple leaf. My brother told me to tell you or he would not tell me where my bourbon is. Get it audio recorded, published, do it now for your a busy girl.
regarding some deleted poem...	29-Jan-03/6:15 AM
I am glad your back as your work is quality, but this is too kooky for me this is the only one of yours i have found stagment, however it is not a 1 its at least a 5 but thats poemranker for you dodgy votes are rife from time to time, nice to have u back sir.
Re: Beauty, sleeping by Ranger	30-Jan-03/9:59 AM
After reading mucho of your stuff I find this has some choice lines but it needs to woven in parts, I will have a better look and vote tomorrow but imagine britney spears tits being covered up in a woolly jumper and you got this poem, you know the beautys there but you cant quite see it. Anyway apparently ranger we belong to a brit pack? gotta go or she'll be moody
regarding some deleted poem...	31-Jan-03/3:22 AM
Polished *8*
regarding some deleted poem...	31-Jan-03/3:24 AM
Everyone including me says crimson lips, shall we think of more original ones, help me out here I came up with....claret, but theres not enough alternatives for red when you think about it
Re: All I Feel by brokenwing	31-Jan-03/3:27 AM
The Devil man said it all really. This is the best one i've read of yours its got a bit of imagery and reads quite well, by no means the finished article, was this written spontaneously? if so a re-write may be difficult without those emotions -7-