Re: Frozen Angel by Ranger	Glasseyez 204.49.132.146	10-Feb-06/7:48 PM
I think this is great
Re: a comment on Moonlight Paradox Riddle Answered by Glasseyez	Glasseyez 204.49.132.146	10-Feb-06/7:45 PM
Yea I guess so, its a tough riddle to figure out, did the answer disappoint you though?
Re: a comment on writer's block by Zoetrope	Zoetrope 172.146.136.54	10-Feb-06/7:27 PM
Hey, thanks. I have the worst time w/ writer's block, and what sometimes helps me is to work on something I don't really care about, just start writing crap and not worrying about it. It's the worrying that kills. Half the time the crap is crap, the other half, it's mostly crap with something salvageable. Thanks for the welcome (everybody).
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	MacFrantic 172.199.126.156	10-Feb-06/3:52 PM
Impressive, in a word. *10*
Re: The Acorn Daisies by MacFrantic	MacFrantic 172.199.126.156	10-Feb-06/3:47 PM
oops, *they're*, goddamn it
Re: a comment on The Struggling Poet's Lament by Ranger	Ranger 62.252.32.15	10-Feb-06/3:41 PM
Hopefully the idea of the poet dressing his poem in embellishment and metaphor but ultimately finding he hasn't put it together well enough will come through as well; if it doesn't then I have some work to do... Cheers for the comments as well!
Re: a comment on My Father’s World by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.32.104	10-Feb-06/3:27 PM
I’d rather write ass.
Re: My Father’s World by Dovina	richa 81.178.228.137	10-Feb-06/3:11 PM
When I first read this the voice in my head was reading with a whisper and I missed that it was rhymed in an aa bb manner. On second read I heard it and it seems kind of pointless. This is not written in couplets after all. Other than that this is a fine poem. It is devoid of your usual pretention and that is why we continue to argue with you. At the back of our minds we think 'yeah, she talks ass, but in time she'll reflect on our advice and realise we were correct'. It makes it all worth while for me.
Re: a comment on Everything That You've Ever Wanted by drnick	wilco 24.92.74.122	10-Feb-06/1:33 PM
You're right and wrong. EVERYONE here doesn't spend a lot of time on their posts. It's been my experience that people generally just write the first thing that pops into their head, post it and then wonder why they've got a bunch of 4's. THat you spent an hour on it is a good start. Really, it's not about the amount of time you spend but just how much you put into it (If that makes any sense). The more you write and read, the better you'll get. Most of my early posts are complete ass (as are many of my more recent). Also, remember that we're all hacks or we wouldn't be posting here.
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	wilco 24.92.74.122	10-Feb-06/1:26 PM
very nice..at first I was put off by the length (I have a short attention span), but you pulled it off nicely.
Re: The Struggling Poet's Lament by Ranger	Dovina 69.175.32.104	10-Feb-06/1:23 PM
So many images put together - seamstress, makup artist, lover - all with viewpoints and imaginations. But it works well. My sister is a seamstress, and she dresses herself.
Re: The Struggling Poet's Lament by Ranger	wilco 24.92.74.122	10-Feb-06/1:20 PM
pretty and all that
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	Dovina 69.175.32.104	10-Feb-06/1:01 PM
Funny and serious. A good read. Welcome.
Re: a comment on Everything That You've Ever Wanted by drnick	god'swife 71.103.105.208	10-Feb-06/12:24 PM
It usually takes me several days to finish a poem. Not that I spend the whole time working on it. You have to walk away and come back. I usually keep the idea I'm trying to get across somewhere in my mind, for example your analogy for softness, and I pay attention to words hear or images I see that convey what i'm trying to represent. You can also invision something from your past that was extremely soft(noun or the experience itself) and try to incorporate into the poem.
Re: a comment on My Father’s World by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.32.104	10-Feb-06/12:11 PM
“Heaved is a bit “tortured,” I have to admit. “Unction” was used quite a bit by the religious prior generation to describe a fervent or earnest quality especially in dealing with religious matters. Thanks for the comment.
Re: Everything That You've Ever Wanted by drnick	god'swife 71.103.105.208	10-Feb-06/12:11 PM
I read this yesterday and didn't know exactly what bothered me about it. I like this poem, and I love the title, but there are a few thiings you possibly could make better. For example; elope means to runaway, yes, but for the majority it means to runaway with & get married so it kinda confuses things at the start. baby's pillows? Are they softer than children or adult pillows? In the 7th line you move from the sea and moonlight to enourmous atoms. Maybe a break in stanza would give it a much needed segue.
Re: a comment on Everything That You've Ever Wanted by drnick	Ranger 62.252.32.15	10-Feb-06/12:03 PM
An hour is a decent amount of time to spend working on an idea. Unless it's one of those moments of astonishing inspiration you'll need to come back to it to fine tune the details. The imagery in this poem isn't at all bad; don't feel bad about asking for advice, that's what we're here for.
Re: Moonlight Paradox Riddle Answered by Glasseyez	Ranger 62.252.32.15	10-Feb-06/11:57 AM
I guessed the bit about 'I Am' (eimi ei) so can I have a bonus point?
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	god'swife 71.103.105.208	10-Feb-06/11:52 AM
You're a hell of a writer. I'm currently suffering from a tremendous case of writer's block. And the interesting thing is I came on to this sight about 2 weeks ago to get some help. The last time I was really productive was around 3 years ago when I first sign on to this Poet's asylum. Very serendipitis. This is long but it still reads like poetry.
Re: Going Away to Fight a War by wilco	Glasseyez 204.49.132.34	10-Feb-06/10:42 AM
Its great the way you explain the life of a soldier