Re: The Book of Images by Dovina	ALChemy 24.74.100.11	31-Jan-06/2:56 PM
I would rather you work these images into a story or into something about yourself than just list them. You could have shown how the images reflect off each other. Like Abraham seeing the ram with his head stuck in the thicket and Christ with his crown of thorns. It was still well worth the read though.
Re: Les Imagistes by Nicholas Jones	god'swife 71.103.98.44	31-Jan-06/7:43 PM
I wish i could understand this philosophy. Are you saying that in their quest for purity( a poem without any unproductive lines), the imagists are taking the narrow view? If they would not be so precise and allow themselves to poetically wander to the point of actually opposing some statement within the poem, that the poem would be better for it? As for the this poem I think it's quite good. Though it weakens in the third and fourth stanzas. This whole thing about having an idea and creating the poem to fit the idea seems to be the opposite of what the imagists were attempting. I thought the imagists illustrated their experiences allowing meaning to emerge out of the images. Now I've confused myself. It's ironic that lines I love in this poem could be considered imagist. 'But still' seems inappropriate since in the first stanza you use '...noise of the urban morning...' The birds, footsteps and most especially the traffic are urban noises, so the but still looks like your going to reflect on the comparative peace and quiet. The duck image is brilliant. did you invent it?
regarding some deleted poem...	god'swife 71.103.98.44	31-Jan-06/7:54 PM
There are lot's of good things about this poem. Rhythm, images, tone, stand out to me right now. Around the third stanza I have trouble following the action. I'm not sure if it's syntax or maybe because the images you're using get vaguer. My favorite stanzas are one and five. though i believe the first stanza would be better if you removed the 'to' at the end.
Re: The correct order of things by Stephen Robins	Caducus 80.168.238.107	1-Feb-06/1:46 AM
Cool satire and how you view those who view different parts of society was done really well. Reminded me of hte Blur parklife album with its wit yet their was a sense of humor mixed in with acute observations. Is this Dark Angel inspired? or are you not one of his many aka's?
Re: The Book of Images by Dovina	Caducus 80.168.238.107	1-Feb-06/1:48 AM
The meter might not work for some but it suits the tone of the poem. Also for me the truth in the first 4 lines of stanza 2 was spot on. Favourited ! well done.
Re: Les Imagistes by Nicholas Jones	ALChemy 24.74.100.11	1-Feb-06/5:09 AM
Your proposed method seems less like a duck on a frozen lake and more like a duck shot by a Duck-shot shell.
regarding some deleted poem...	Caducus 80.168.238.107	1-Feb-06/5:11 AM
Anyone who has seen Brando in 'last tango in paris' will appreciate this line: The moon has grown fat.. It certainly was. On a serious note this haiku has been dissected to death, do i like it? does it inspire and conjure? Yes.
regarding some deleted poem...	ALChemy 24.74.100.11	1-Feb-06/5:22 AM
The 25 "I"s and 23 "you"s not to mention the umpteen "my"s and "yours" have numbed my senses to anything important that your poem has to say.
Re: Valentine? by celticskatermatt1	Ranger 62.252.32.15	1-Feb-06/5:30 AM
The penultimate line is far too long given how quick the rest of the poem is, line 6 is a bit cheesy, other than that a very readable ditty.
Re: A Cleansing Of Creeds by Caducus	Ranger 62.252.32.15	1-Feb-06/5:34 AM
Stanza 4 should, ironically, become the atheists' creed.
Re: Giving in to a boring suggestion by Joe-joe	ecargo 167.219.88.140	1-Feb-06/6:55 AM
Ha--cute. Want to take on my upstairs neighbors who walk on hard wood floors in high heels?
Re: Les Imagistes by Nicholas Jones	ecargo 167.219.88.140	1-Feb-06/7:10 AM
Imagism is considered more of a parallel to sculpture than to painting. So the idea of "purging" or paring seems very apt--rather than layering images they focus on the core, the clean lines. This is clever because you practice what you preach--the seemingly extraneous imagery--the 7-inch, the opening stanzas. Thoughtful and thought-provoking.
Re: Les Imagistes by Nicholas Jones	Dovina 17.255.240.138	1-Feb-06/11:15 AM
I like CS Lewis on the use of imagination. His image of the lion in Narnia, for example, came as a dream, but he developed the image, the character, beyond the initial vision using logic and allusion. Your duck walking on ice, and confused by the image of walking on water, is ready, as think you might be implying, to make something poetic and meaningful from that experience.
regarding some deleted poem...	Nicholas Jones 86.135.241.4	1-Feb-06/12:48 PM
Aren't Sick of It All a rubbish metal band or something? And this a disappointing effort.
Re: Valentine? by celticskatermatt1	Nicholas Jones 86.135.241.4	1-Feb-06/12:50 PM
I hate postmodernism, it's become impossible to tell when something is cleverly ironic and deconstructive or just shit. On this one I'm going for the latter.
Re: Even the elephants by ecargo	god'swife 71.103.98.44	1-Feb-06/5:33 PM
It's a bit strained. Though I do like the use of mostly one syllable words, it seems to stutter and I can't get a clear image. You've out-Plathed Plath.
Re: A Cleansing Of Creeds by Caducus	god'swife 71.103.98.44	1-Feb-06/5:36 PM
This is damn good. The first two stanzas don't add anything to the statement made here
regarding some deleted poem...	ecargo 172.165.177.120	1-Feb-06/7:56 PM
;-)
Re: Penny Loafer Blues by ALChemy	god'swife 71.103.98.44	1-Feb-06/7:58 PM
Creative idea(very creative). I think you should trim it a little for greater impact. But don't fiddle with it too much, it might lose its charm.
Re: Valentine? by celticskatermatt1	god'swife 71.103.98.44	1-Feb-06/8:06 PM
looks like it's written by a hop-hop Eskimo trying to crossover to boy-band inspired greeting cards.