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A Cleansing Of Creeds (Free verse) by Caducus A lawn of ribs,
Mortals dew.
Eagles and vultures
A new Eden.
Leather mountains
by ivory ponds
Luger slings
Goliath kills David.
Blind Gods,
all self proclaimed
Heil Jesus
Heil Hitler
Heil rankless Jew.
Man makes man
Man made God
Jews made money
And paid well for it.
New generation Nazis
can we forget now?
I cannot stomach Jew or German
can we forgive now?
Muslim butcher in Palestine
can I call you David?
Halal slaughtered Jews in Starbucks
can I call you Mohammed?
Let me name you as I see you
"Brother"
Do you see me now?
I am flesh and blood
truth and Braille,
I laugh and cry like you
yet different,
I was born with faith
bloodied from a womb like you
and I will not live bloody
I will die creedless
Godless and pure.
Up the ladder:
Figment
Down the ladder:
Celestial Veil
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.75
Posted: October 25, 2003 2:57 AM PDT; Last modified: February 1, 2006 1:42 AM PSTWeighted score: 5.089402 Overall Rank: 6283 Comments:
[8]
Ranger @ 62.252.32.15
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1-Feb-06/5:34 AM
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Reply
Stanza 4 should, ironically, become the atheists' creed.
[8]
Ranger @ 62.252.32.15
> Ranger
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1-Feb-06/5:42 AM
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Reply
What the monk, it says there are 3 other comments on here but I can't see them...nentwined, are you playing jokes again?
This is damn good. The first two stanzas don't add anything to the statement made here
The first 2 stanza seem like you were going to write something else...seems disconnected in style from the rest of it. This is not the first I have seen lately drawing parallels. Surprised you didn't throw Sudan into the mix, but hey, you did address this well. (I am relieved when I see other drawing the parallels, too. Gives me some sort of faith in intellegence. Basing my score on your Dropping the first two stanzas, and using them somewhere else, as they ARE rather unigue.
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