Free verse № 72047

A Cleansing Of Creeds

Member since 2002 · Posted 25 Oct 2003 · Edited 1 Feb 2006 · 4 comments

A lawn of ribs, Mortals dew. Eagles and vultures A new Eden. Leather mountains by ivory ponds Luger slings Goliath kills David. Blind Gods, all self proclaimed Heil Jesus Heil Hitler Heil rankless Jew. Man makes man Man made God Jews made money And paid well for it. New generation Nazis can we forget now? I cannot stomach Jew or German can we forgive now? Muslim butcher in Palestine can I call you David? Halal slaughtered Jews in Starbucks can I call you Mohammed? Let me name you as I see you "Brother" Do you see me now? I am flesh and blood truth and Braille, I laugh and cry like you yet different, I was born with faith bloodied from a womb like you and I will not live bloody I will die creedless Godless and pure.

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mean 5.75 weighted 5.09 rank 6273 views 325 View voting details →

4 votes so far. Yours would make 5.4 votes so far

4 comments

[8] Ranger 1-Feb-06/5:34 AM Reply

Stanza 4 should, ironically, become the atheists' creed.

[8] Ranger › Ranger 1-Feb-06/5:42 AM Reply

What the monk, it says there are 3 other comments on here but I can't see them...nentwined, are you playing jokes again?

[8] god'swife 1-Feb-06/5:36 PM Reply

This is damn good. The first two stanzas don't add anything to the statement made here

[7] LilMsLadyPoet 2-Feb-06/8:54 AM Reply

The first 2 stanza seem like you were going to write something else...seems disconnected in style from the rest of it. This is not the first I have seen lately drawing parallels. Surprised you didn't throw Sudan into the mix, but hey, you did address this well. (I am relieved when I see other drawing the parallels, too. Gives me some sort of faith in intellegence. Basing my score on your Dropping the first two stanzas, and using them somewhere else, as they ARE rather unigue.