Quarton
on Mirror by Quarton
7 Mar 2007, 8:14 PM
Thank you.
Damn, this is good! I like the rhyme scheme which is unforced and adds to the read and flow. How about a 10 plus.
Interesting comment regarding the "conveyor belt." The warming of the earth causing the breakdown of these natural currents which, paradoxically, leads to an overall cooling event. Kind of damned if you do and damned if you don't. Regardless, we are in big trouble with little or no acknowledgement by our president and the multi-national corporations which are in control. Profit at any price and damn the coonsequences mentality. Go Gore! Oh, almost forgot. Great poem.
144.173.5.19
144.173.5.8
144.173.6.76
144.173.6.77
212.219.142.161
82.32.187.13
82.32.197.58
82.46.44.244
84.43.106.156
84.43.108.4
88.144.69.217
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144.173.5.19
144.173.5.8
144.173.6.76
144.173.6.77
212.219.142.161
82.32.187.13
82.32.197.58
82.46.44.244
84.43.106.156
84.43.108.4
88.144.69.217
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144.173.6.77
212.219.142.161
82.32.187.13
82.32.197.58
82.46.44.244
84.43.106.156
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88.144.69.217
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I have smelled a better cunty poem than this.
Total shit.
It doesn't have an obvious name to me. I tried for about ten minutes, but it's obvious I'll need to let this one stir in my brain for a bit.
a bit story like...but a nice little tale...and who says every poem has to rhyme and jingle...fair attempt
what about Mis(s)interpreted for a title...by the way a different style, must say
as an afterthought, i suppose "Sleepless" might be a better title...the readers pls. also suggest an apt title .
nice personification...i think the whole stanza should not be reapeated considering the lyric as a whole is a short one...may be repeating one or two key lines would be better. The lyric makes its point clear in a motivated sense. good attempt.
Interesting read - in a few places it sounds more science textbook-y than poetic ('ever increasing complexity' etc.) I liked stanza 5 and its cosmic dance - perhaps a reference to Holst's Planets Suite would have been appropriate there?
It's certainly a piece with some education behind it - I like that, but my failing is a short attention span. Maybe cutting it into two or three sections would make it easier for simpletons like myself to read in one sitting?
Good poem though.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You are hilarious!
Those were ip addresses from my college system.
-10- for making me cry with laughter.
"So you took him to bed and when he wanted sex you stormed out in a moral huff?"
Besides, I was that diner and I did not appreciate it when a stranger went in me. I may have stood up, but I'd rather not have my stool pushed in.
Top drawer stuff.
Aside from 'smally dance' this is so good. I don't know why people haven't read you more on here.
I'd like to hear this one, as I can't tell whether the rhyme of 'fury' and 'money' (and 'Mississippi') will be distracting or not.