hi lenore...honey, you know i give two shits about spelling as long as you tried hard or were genuine, but on line 16 i'm positive you meant throne, love you.take care.fix it or not. i'll vote twice. i thought for a second it might work as thrown..then i was like naw...even i know better.loves again..be well..soft.swear.sugar.on.the.asphalt. great nasty poem it's what i call a 'puffer'. or if you like the violent femmes it's a "blister in the sun". "let me go on". "i hope you know that this will go down on your permanent record" finger up to the gods of revenge and lust and all that other glorious pilliging...go berzerk!w

Mental Note: Do not piss off Lenore. Let's hear it for sweet revenge! 8/10

You are correct,I should have used spell check. Thanks for the heads up. ;)

I know it's tradition that when one of the 'real' poets on this site starts tossing off all over a poem, nobody else is allowed to say it's bad because otherwise they don't get it, but like what the fuck is so great about this one? It uses pseudo-olde language and vaguely rhymes and scans, and it expresses what I'm sure is a heart-felt emotion, but there's nothing worth mentioning in my opinion... this site is turning into poemwanker. first horus8 starts. then bachus, eager to be part of the 'let's go overboard being enthusiastic because then people will know we're real writers, we care about nothing but writing; that's our passion and we're of course completely unaware of the fact that we constantly go on about how it's our passion, because we're so absorbed in writing, and not the image, which is why we go on poemranker, not to get attention, but because some of the best poetry in the world is here' wagon, starts using sexual metaphor as a sort of coy but smug way of ladling out praise. Somewhere along the way usually 'razora' pipes up with her opinion, which will match horus8's. It's 10 times more insidious to tell people they're good when they're not to tell them they're crap when they're not.

Dark Angel, Why don't you tell us all what you really feel? Why whine in mere snippets when you can purge your bitterness in one or two good forced fits of projectile vomiting?

a) I just did tell you what I really think. b) Your opinion of me is completely determined by the fact that I disagreed with horus8's over the top praise of your poem, so it's bull shit. People like you are what make the world such a frustrating place. You can't seem to make any distinction between whining and 'negative' comments in general. The world of opinions is divided up in two in your mind: 'whining' and 'positive comments'. Whining is what mean, bitter, unsatisfied people do, whereas positive comments are made by bright, smiling, cool, happy people. Presumably you would rather people just express nice, supportive thoughts and emotions, because then we would all feel good about ourselves! c) It's a sign of a great poet that he reacts to anti-praise of his poetry with an ad hominem attack.

Does this mean you want me?

wait hold everything..why i hold my penis..sure this isn't the most stylish, intelligent, or multi faceted piece, but it's got villianous, deceit,bashing, blood evil doings, and sickly sweey smells...and most of all..big boobies terrorizing..that's not so bad..we can't always fuck sylvia plath(who wasn't good looking anyway) sometimes we need a heather thomas poem to stimulate the flacid capilaries..lighten up d.a.. no one thought you would like it any way..most of us have a keen awareness of what you like.. you no deep movies like xxx, and muscle shows, drag racing, ding dongs, and science fiction comic books, which is why your a demigouge w/ a nucleur fissioned engine. morning guys. my thumb still hurts.it's officially a vicadine day. so mote it be!s

Horus8: I vote 10 on that comment. Applause!

Your idea of what 'd.a.' likes is so wildly inaccurate that even Poetie probably has a better idea. The fact is I have hardly said anything about what I like. Does this mean I don't like anything? Of course not. I could give a long list of what I like, but I think that gushing about one's interests and/or 'passions' is one of the most odious things a human being can do. Let's just say that, if what you just said is an accurate representation of your opinion, then what you think I like is almost nothing like what I like. I do not go overboard on praise. Perhaps I go overboard on criticism. You go overboard on praise. Maybe I'm missing something, but it seems to me that constantly feigning orgasm over poemes doesn't prove anything about your ability to appreciate poetry. Especially in your case, since 90% of the time you're fucked out of your brain and find everything either awful or divine. The trick is to get over your own sense of deliberately-self-induced 'child-like wonder'. I may write a book on all the bullshit I have in my brain just to get it out of the way. The central theme will be something to do with people's incessant clinging on to 'seeing the world like a child' and constantly telling themselves things are wonderful and special and magical. That is why people clap when a cripple wins a race. They want to live in a world in which things end up like in children's books. It makes them feel safe and happy. Part of this illusion is approving of everything that initially seems good, or even better than average.
This is a child's misapprehension. To write poetry about musty book shops is trite. It may evoke nostalgic feelings of childhood wonder, but then what doesn't? It doesn't make the poem any good. It is trite to write poetry about: sunny days, lost love, the futility of existence, etc, etc. Anything that evokes a sense of nostalgia for childhood is probably a bad poem, simply because the author concentrated on creating a vague longing rather than any actual message. This is good if done properly; however, even though it is usually not done properly, people still clamour about how beautiful it is. Your teachers have probably told you to make it 'real' when you write. How can you make poetry real? By saying the thing you want to say in the most genuine way you can; you should try to be as accurate as possible. Part of being accurate is shedding your set of cosy habits, among which are: the habit of believing your own hype, the habit of clinging on to good first impressions, the habit of believing that rush-of-pleasure-checmical-in-brain = beautiful and right and good and special and wonderful and childlike and a daisy being picked by a three year old in a sun hat who gives it to her mother and they drive to a pool party and laugh and then someone throws a brick at the child's head. I doubt anyone's still reading, but the real point I want to make is this: don't let the desire for good poetry let you believe that bad poetry is good.

Who is this D.A. Are you from misery, USA. I am looking for my father. Everyone should read this before they write on this site!

wow, d.a....don't have an anuerysm, i was just fuckin around, you know 'joking', and no he's not from misery, usa..you fairy fart..he's from cleveland....and was considered to be the american version of rimbaud..he was murdered at the age of 26, (by the government) and now his ghost haunts these corridors(him and his friends were called the underground thought patrol, if you don't believe me look it up'i'm serious') as dark angel.here is a qoute from CLEVELAND UNDERCOVERS "but that was then/NOW i am, and do not expect/tomorrow or yesterday today. instead i write in exstacy/and when someone stops to say/"Hey, that's not true!"/i yell backwards,"For who........and fuck rhyme."i have a city to cover with lines, with textured words & the sweat brick-flesh images of a drunken tied-up whore house cowtown/sprawling and brawling on its back." p.s that's why i put up with his genius, he is my favorite poet. thanks again lenore for your space and words. i hope i didn't sound absurd

Fairy fart? That is creative. Homophobic ramble aside, do you have these strokes of genius often? I am looking for my father, read the text, and quit kowtowing. It does not look good on paper (or in this case a computer screen).