Re: a comment on Trembling Worry by Ninoy_Instigator	8-Oct-02/7:53 PM
And she looks sexy in a burka! Can you handle that.
Re: a comment on Trembling Worry by Ninoy_Instigator	8-Oct-02/7:44 PM
Just tie her up already. Smother her in the burka, sherpa, furpa. Frumpy and in the kitchen. I like 'em that way too. And I gave input to the poem. I said it was as bad as Cheese Whiz and you deleted my comment. And then I said censorship was against you martyrs principles, or was it? Huh! Do you burn poems? Do you want to gas the Americans?
Re: Smoking Clitoris with PHD handles by <{Baba^Yaga}>	8-Oct-02/3:52 PM
change friends to peeps.
Re: Tree by jauser	7-Oct-02/7:05 PM
It is the fucking Lorax. He really does exist. I knew it. Indeed, you may be a cute, albeit, odd looking little fellow and an activist for good causes like that big hole in the sky, but your poem here, well, sucks. But you knew that already, because of your genius.
Re: a comment on one word by Blade	3-Oct-02/7:57 AM
You are obsessed with absolutes. It is a mathematical conundrum. Everything begins halfway. We all begin at five, so we theoretically we need 25 zeros without any other number to bop it up to have the resolution of nothing.
Re: a comment on Recent History by Nicholas Jones	3-Oct-02/7:51 AM
Why, just because it is not a good poem, it is not the worst poem. Must we cater to your sociological experiment?
Re: Instructions to a Sculptor by Christof	3-Oct-02/7:46 AM
Modern Hawthorne in a weird wacky way. Good show. I like it when you do not write boring poems. So what is it with you: pro fox or anti fox?
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/2:44 PM
As I would make a good woman. We shall slow things down. There is no rush. I am off to run the streets of San Francisco before meeting a friend who tempts me as much as you. But that is another story.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/2:29 PM
There in lies the problem. No matter how attracted we could be to one another physically or mentally, it would not function because of that factor. Could you dig me on the level of who I am or only on the level of what I am? Most likely not. That is where the water comes in, showers, baths, waterfalls. We need it to sustain us. And if there was a pass, I would eventually break you down with my cruelty, no matter how much I loved you, and you would hopefully leave me. It has been and endless cycle. I am what you are afraid to be. There I summed it up.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/2:24 PM
Does the learning not show in the words I write? But let's not try to justify cruelty. It is what it is.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/2:11 PM
What would make cruelty noble?
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/1:56 PM
I am just looking at the words you put here and a quick perusal of your website. You describe the way people who have experienced depression like 99% of the other people who describe it. And that is not a bad thing, but you are attempting a different medium and maybe somewhere in here you have a chance or even the ability to hop over to that 1%. That is not an easy thing, especially if you are in a good comfort zone. It is not comfortable being a writer. And that is where I come in. Plus, you say you wrote many of your feelings as you were actually experiencing them. Now step back and think about that. What really can we accomplish that is worth a shit when we are depressed? Nothing. But we have the ability to understand the feelings, it makes us self aware and self obsessed and usually looking back does not take us to the pit again, but helps us understand where and why we were there. I.E. Poetry.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/1:42 PM
Would you really like it if I were in pain? Physically or mentally. Which would give you the most satisfaction? To see me bleeding (which is actually quite often) or heart broken. Which? Would you actually want to slap me across the face or merely hold me and sooth the wreckage that is me. If I were ugly, would it make things easier? If I were less, bold. You tell me, you ask me. I will give you the answers. My aim is true.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/1:23 PM
Or look at it another way. Maybe people see something in you and are trying to yank it the fuck out. Don't always look down. It is not pleasant in a man. And you will get a hump by time you are 40.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/1:20 PM
Okay lone shadow here it goes: Line one is confusing: Falling past memories is an obscure image for reflection. Line two: get rid of cherished. It is a trite word. Combined together you start out with something vague rather than concrete so the read has no footing to stand on. Falling swiftly past memories Of love I once thought she cherished The long nights, holding her so close feeling the rhythm of her heartbeat as my love blankets her heart, keeping it safe all this is sap. From winter's frigid touch here is the first decent line. Maybe start here and work from this. Each kiss oh so gentle, yet full of passion sap. a gentle kiss would automatically denote passion. sapphire eyes (reflecting) twilight, this creates more of a sense of loss. It is an image working for you twofold. Looking into is telling us something we already know. If you know the color of the eyes, obviously you looked into them. So much like a dream, like heaven made true a double whammy of bad cliches. Tears welling, wishing it didn't end To see her smile, oh god her smile comes off like a cheesy styx song. Okay, I quit here.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/1:08 PM
damn.
Re: a comment on Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/1:04 PM
this has nothing to do with you. What did you do with GWs stream of conscious?
Re: Fall from Love's Grace by loneshadow29	1-Oct-02/12:30 PM
How bout.. Fucking bitch you broke my heart, you ain't nothing but a stupid, lousy tart, now i lie alone and sad, you made me feel so fucking bad, you left because i was a loser, but will you love me as a boozer you smug lousy lay give me back my t.v. give me back my cb, so i can hit the road tugging all day and keep the memory of your ugly smile at bay, you hag you drag take a cab to my pad i wll show what you never had. That is direct.
Re: Cheap Thrills by Owner of the Sky	1-Oct-02/10:29 AM
I did not call you an idiot; I said your comment and rebuttal were full of idiocy, which they were. But I am sorry if I hurt your feelings in any way. I am a kind man who is fond of goats. And the day is lovely in California, so I shall only give you sweet regards from this moment hence. God is dead.
Re: a comment on Cheap Thrills by Owner of the Sky	1-Oct-02/10:12 AM
Yes, your comment was full of idiocy and your rebuttal was also silly. Every writer who is a writer and struggles with writing knows that you must "show" and not tell. It is the images, the metaphors, etc. that transcend the work from a mere report on an observation into something resembling art. Instead of getting your shorts in a mess, take a look at the poem and see what you can do with it. Find where you can replace telling with images. Like I said, it is a nice idea, but a poor attempt at communicating it.