| Re: a comment on Our New Tongue by Christof |
8-Nov-02/1:39 AM |
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Why thank you. It's nice to see old stuff revisited, and this one in particular means a lot to me. It was something of an exorcism.
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| Re: Necromantic Boo-boo by razorgrin |
8-Nov-02/1:18 AM |
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You goddam voodoo types and your lack of foresight. Always check with your local augury reader first.
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| Re: Perversions by razorgrin |
8-Nov-02/1:16 AM |
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The last one is the best - to combine fisting with petty theft is truly a gift.
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| Re: a comment on Some Things by Christof |
7-Nov-02/8:49 AM |
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I'm a silver-tongued devil, and no mistake
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| Re: a comment on Some Things by Christof |
7-Nov-02/8:46 AM |
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I'll take that as a compliment, z.
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| Re: a comment on Some Things by Christof |
7-Nov-02/8:26 AM |
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I wouldn't dare scrutuinize you, Mrs G. That would be most discourteous. You're lucky that you're in America where I can't see you!
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| Re: a comment on Returning by INTRANSIT |
7-Nov-02/7:12 AM |
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No problem, my friend, always glad to be of assistance.
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| Re: a comment on Returning by INTRANSIT |
7-Nov-02/6:23 AM |
Look at m stuff and you'll see that i always think less is more! That new one I've posted today is the longest I've written in weeks. Anyway, looking at this I don't think it's a question so much of length as of tone. The last stanza seems to me just too hysterical-sounding. Perhaps if you opted for a less exalted diction e.g. 'I do not/don't deserve' not 'I deserve not' it would help. Trust your own ears though, not mine.
I don't deserve her kindness
or her pouring herself into me
but I can never stop her
because it doesn't belong to me.
Just a suggestion. Do with it as you wish.
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| Re: a comment on Returning by INTRANSIT |
7-Nov-02/6:10 AM |
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No I didn't. I gather there was some controversy over some capitals - I can't comment on those!
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| Re: Returning by INTRANSIT |
7-Nov-02/6:02 AM |
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I can see the Odysseus thing - allt he sailing and beacon images. I think i would finish after 'again, safe', although 'throwing my ribs/ at her feet' is good'. Perhaps hold that over for a separate poem entirely? It find this last stanza difficult because i appreciate why you want those emotions there, and it does complicate your homecoming in an interesting way, but I think your expression is just too fevered.
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| Re: Never Alone at Night by Limness |
1-Nov-02/8:05 AM |
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This really is a poem of the night, all the dark longings and questionings that we don't want to face in the daylight. The last stanza and the final line are very moving indeed. I love this.
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| Re: SAMUEL by kliq |
1-Nov-02/7:15 AM |
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| Re: a comment on The Funnyman by Christof |
1-Nov-02/7:10 AM |
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I was thinking more Stan Boardman
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| Re: a comment on The Funnyman by Christof |
1-Nov-02/6:54 AM |
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Thanks, that was the idea, glad it worked for you!
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| Re: Avetis by KilIluminati |
1-Nov-02/2:47 AM |
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Is this translated from another language?
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| Re: the ultimate battle by teacup |
1-Nov-02/2:42 AM |
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Yes this is pretty funny. Pizza always provokes turf wars
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| Re: a comment on St. Andrews University Marxist Society by Nicholas Jones |
1-Nov-02/2:41 AM |
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I imagine msot people in the Labour Club were quite right wing anyway. You don't find a lot of Socialists in the Labour party any more.
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| Re: St. Andrews University Marxist Society by Nicholas Jones |
1-Nov-02/2:36 AM |
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Well, if you are going to hang out at St Andrews what do you expect? Oxford was much the same. This is very wry.
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| Re: Slept by Nicholas Jones |
1-Nov-02/2:34 AM |
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This happens to me all the time. Guitly conscience or something. Anyway, I recognise a fellow sufferer.
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:23 AM |
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I'm sorry, but I can't have people being more excited by my brothers than they are by me. Sibling rivalry.
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