| Re: Here's your God by Caducus |
Dovina 12.72.37.50 |
1-Aug-06/12:52 PM |
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Do I smell rancor on the ranker? I know itâs poemranker, not poetranker, but itâs hard to be objective on this one. First the easy stuff: why the â>â and the double space before âJesusâ? Then the logical stuff, like how can cataracts be silver and gold? And the grammar stuff like, âIsraeli,â âPalestinianâ and âTexan.â But what intrigues me about this is the prayer of David, a man after Godâs own heart, who said, âStrike all my enemies in the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked.â Itâs taken a long time, maybe, and the answer isnât as expected, and it makes it look a whole lot like something else, but who knows the ways of God. Anyway, youâve well expressed an angst.
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| Re: Life Addict by Enkidu |
Dovina 12.72.34.50 |
1-Aug-06/1:35 PM |
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| Re: A Poem For George Bush by Edna Sweetlove |
Mr Pig 86.137.20.84 |
2-Aug-06/7:57 AM |
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| Re: I wish I was a chav by Stephen Robins |
Mr Pig 86.137.20.84 |
2-Aug-06/8:03 AM |
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My son Edgar Von Smythe the third has recently been dating a girl called Chelsea whom I suspect is 'Chavesque'. She has a potty mouth and last week I was about to enter his bedroom till he shouted 'Father do not come in, Chelsea is going down on me'
I had a feeling she was depressed and made her some earl grey but the ungrateful girl at least was being comforted by Edgar.
Edgar is my only child from my first wife Lai-Longtime from Thailand.
Nice poem it reeled me in my boy.
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| Re: A Poem For George Bush by Edna Sweetlove |
ALChemy 71.75.188.163 |
2-Aug-06/2:58 PM |
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It was reported that "Angola became the top source of crude imports to oil-hungry China last month, replacing Saudi Arabia as its main supplier"
This is why GWB considers Iraq a success.
The weapons of mass distruction are in China and Saudi Arabia is a main supplier of oil to them. Just in case you were wondering why we're really in the middle east.
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| Re: Here's your God by Caducus |
MacFrantic 71.208.112.134 |
2-Aug-06/8:40 PM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
MacFrantic 71.208.112.134 |
2-Aug-06/11:55 PM |
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This is SO good, the voters should do this justice. It's fantastic.
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| Re: I wish I was a chav by Stephen Robins |
Ranger 86.131.57.216 |
3-Aug-06/12:52 AM |
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This is quite possibly the best thing you've written. Stanza 5 made me fall off my chair laughing. Maybe 'tracksuit' would be more accurate as 'shellsuit'?
You know, a lack of McDonald's nearby means that the gathering place for chavvage is the bench outside 7-11, or, latterly, the bike racks outside Tesco.
A most shining nine -bow'ls-
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| Re: glittery red with rockets ripping through by FreeFormFixation |
Ranger 86.131.57.216 |
3-Aug-06/12:54 AM |
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First 3 stanzas are excellent.
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| Re: I wish I was a chav by Stephen Robins |
ecargo 167.219.88.140 |
3-Aug-06/11:35 AM |
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Oooh--a new term! They didn't cover this in any of the Sophie Kinsella books I've read (I have appalling taste in 'literature,' and almost everything I know about British pop culture comes from terrible Brit-chick-lit novels). I've identified a few Chavs here at work, even (although the hip-hop wannabe element is lacking, so I guess they're not true Chavs).
Wikipedia has way too much documentation on the phenomenon (all of which you've nailed):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav
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| Re: Portrait of a King by MacFrantic |
Dovina 70.38.78.229 |
3-Aug-06/12:22 PM |
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So many images going on here! The first line leads us to God, the king, in a red mantle. The next three lines show the observerâs disgust with God, or with literature that falls as waste, or both. Verse 2 continues the diatribe or disgust. Verse 4 gets back to the âportraitâ in the title, continuing the downward description. The last verse is the most intriguing, an interesting view of it.
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| Re: A Night out With Chaucer by cleverdevice |
Dovina 70.38.78.229 |
3-Aug-06/12:27 PM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Dovina 70.38.78.229 |
3-Aug-06/12:38 PM |
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The first two verses are funny and lead me to want these "words" you speak of, and which the title is so elusive about. And though the following verses are funny, they fail to deliver what seems an incredibly possible punch.
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| Re: Forest by the Sea by Dovina |
Enkidu 172.194.169.205 |
3-Aug-06/12:56 PM |
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Not bad, the last verse could be a little stronger, but i like the idea a lot.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
ecargo 167.219.88.140 |
3-Aug-06/1:08 PM |
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I like this, especially the repetition of phrases in the indented lines and the intriguing ending. But the lie gets lost in here somewhere after a good beginning.
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| Re: Paradise by oneglove |
Ranger 86.138.69.171 |
3-Aug-06/1:34 PM |
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I'm not quite sure what I feel about this poem. It's not a bad poem, but it feels...empty, somehow. I think it's due to a lack of scenery (I crave the images) and a bit of triteness (eyes, broken road etc.) Even so, I'd say that with a certain amount of building upon, this will be a perfectly decent poem.
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| Re: A Night out With Chaucer by cleverdevice |
Ranger 86.138.69.171 |
3-Aug-06/1:42 PM |
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Where the devil have you been all my life? -bow'ls-
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| Re: Nights in the city of Godiva by Mr Pig |
Ranger 86.138.69.171 |
3-Aug-06/1:44 PM |
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When on earth was the last time that Villa played Coventry in any meaningful competition?
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| Re: When Gravity Unmakes You by Enkidu |
Edna Sweetlove 81.178.69.4 |
3-Aug-06/4:35 PM |
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Total over-punctuated bollocks.
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| Re: A Poem For George Bush by Edna Sweetlove |
Enkidu 172.191.51.24 |
3-Aug-06/4:44 PM |
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from Mac, Enk, and D. to you, Edna, this comes with love.
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