zodiac
on some deleted poem
6 Feb 2004, 7:09 PM
This may be satire. But it's also incomprehensible. What's buried deep at the foot of the gate?
very true...parents nowadays don't spend much time with their children so they acted like monkeys (LOL) and no pill can ever cure this other than the time a parent could spend climbing up the tree with them, hey it could be fun after all (LOL). All in all, the poem is really great satirically true.
Work on rythm.
DIDACTIC
profound. And by profound I mean dull. DULL DULL DULL.
oh shut up hippy
awesome
"Do you jerk, jerk
Jerk jerk jerk it,
Before or after here?"
well... I've never really seen one word repeated 5 times in a row and in the same stanza. Kinda odd, dontcha think?
I like all of it except the last 2 lines. It sounds kind of Dr. Suessish to me. . .I like Dr. Suess.
Hey, definitely a good topic. . .I especially like the title
Billy Biff-Chin
on Ducks With AIDs (a feeble attempt of something different) by Blindpoetry
7 Feb 2004, 1:58 AM
Very good. -8-
Sorry about plagiarising your other poems. I was just messing around to piss you off.
This is a real improvement on your other poems.
I agree with the other poets here that it's better to write about new, unexpected things than about stale and tired old subjects.
It's better to write about something that will make everyone sit up and take notice.
The idea of licking an ashtray "to get satisfaction" is surprising and interesting.
The next lesson: learn to think beyond the obvious. I suggest you try to describe things in astonishingly accurate but unexpected ways.
But don't take these poems to school. Teachers won't like you writing about ducks with AIDS. That's because teachers are narrow-minded and unimaginative fools with little aptitude for appreciating originality.
That's a broad generalisation, but I remember how rubbish school can be.
Glad to see you back. You really are a very funny man. In my experience, however, masturbation and poemeranker are unconnected. But I have noticed a close connection between jerking off and my DVD of Teenage Christian Virgins Take It Up The Dirthole 32 (starring Crystal Lane Swift).
Excellent.
By the way, are you aware of the radical changes introduced in your absence (such as hyperlinked IPs)?
This is a real triumph.
I nominate this my poem of the year. And it's only February.
You're only warming up here, I can tell. Delete this poem now. -10-
"there is no skill" lol. Keep telling yourself that. You probably rarely make 4 balls in a row, but in tournaments good players routinely run 4 games in a row. Put you on a snooker table and you probably only make 1 out of 4 shots. But in most world tournaments these days someone posts a perfect game -- that's 36 shots in a row. In what other sport is there such a huge magnitude of difference in results obtained by the average dork & a professional? Pool's more about skill than any other sport going.
b4
Most gays are only faking it to get attention - same with straight people.
This is especially true on poemranker, and specifically true in settle's case.
was the cold-cut bologna by any chance?
Your love of mathematics is obvious. cool title.
Hey, its a cute ditty; more craft than art - and occasionally that's not a terrible thing.
high marks for accessibility - poetry for the wheelchaired masses (and/or harnessed, as the case may be).
Suggestion: change "for fun" to "diversion" - it rhymes a bit better with conclusion. You may want to stick a descriptor in there, "happy", or "playful"; something like that.
You could also change the title to "pool and poetry"...