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Caged World (Free verse) by deep-as-a-puddle
This reality cripples us, leaves us mamed, our five physical phrophets lead us astray. Through my hatred i rise in flame, i swear to live another way To do what makes you happy, a simple vision, persecuted by every religion. A dog that will not chase the stick, institutionalised, then rehabilitated with a kick. Defects from the human production line, riddiculed, never given a chance to shine. I eludicate this point to you, are you kind? look again, ignorant and blind.

Up the ladder: (no title)
Down the ladder: fire

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Weighted score: 4.7310586
Overall Rank: 11813
Posted: December 17, 2002 12:39 PM PST; Last modified: December 17, 2002 12:39 PM PST
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Comments:
[4] nentwined @ 66.92.183.34 | 17-Dec-02/12:57 PM | Reply
mame? or maim? very different things. one's an arcade game emulator.

reads like a bunch of cliches strung together. :/
[7] Caducus @ 62.105.88.10 | 19-Dec-02/8:59 AM | Reply
'Maimed' for the perfectionist in you. this strong piece should not be weakened by spelling errors now bend over boy !

WHATTTEEEEEEESH !

the 1st 4 lines stanza 2 are awesome. 7-
[8] lunar @ 195.92.194.14 | 19-Dec-02/1:29 PM | Reply
i like this a lot better than your other one coz of its randomness! some of the lines are very well written too. I dont really understand it tho! xx
[n/a] deep-as-a-puddle @ 81.77.34.53 > lunar | 28-Jul-03/2:59 PM | Reply
dearest, its about the fact that we are not allowed to live the way we want because someone else has an idea on how it should be done

(line 5) religion restricts the things that makes one happy
(line 8) someone who dosent want to follow set rules is made to do so
(line 10) cripples are constantly persecuted
[8] lunar @ 195.92.67.71 > deep-as-a-puddle | 30-Jul-03/7:48 AM | Reply
Well simple then! hugh what are you doing back on poemranker anywho - you really must be bored!
[0] slapmeonthepatio @ 68.9.128.195 | 6-Feb-04/7:40 PM | Reply
oh shut up hippy
[6] Jill Stockinger @ 0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1 | 27-Dec-20/4:37 PM | Reply
maimed- prophets-
132 view(s)




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