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Myopic Labotomized Hubris (Free verse) by Retaliate The plans on the table
pour liquid from the minds of endless madmen
The myopic lobotomized hubris of a bodiless head that feeds itself
with the invisible hands of miserable men
soon the table will be submerged
and the only thing left in the room
(should we fail to bilge this insanity)
will be our anoxiated swollen carcass and
an empty hollow head like a chalice
floating half-submerged
in its own stagnant meningial fluid
Up the ladder:
The Path of Least Resistance
Down the ladder:
Concieted Checkmate.
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.0
Posted: August 7, 2003 12:06 PM PDT; Last modified: August 8, 2003 11:24 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.537883 Overall Rank: 2534 Comments:
Go ahead and hit the brake. Just let me change lanes first.
If you hit us, the you deserve it for tailgating down the one lane highway to oblivion. :)
Your bodiless head reminds me of Futurama.
Workers of the world unite.
Submerged in what? If it's the only thing left in the room? Perhaps, it's submerging into it's own submergence?
As my Mentor would say "You've strung together some wonderful words here."
I like your mentor's subtlety. A simultaneous compliment and critique if I read it right. Do you think any of these words are ill chosen for their purpose?
The last sentence is basically a list of all things left in the room: a carcass, a head, and all the meningial fluid. Apparently there is enough bilgewater in the head to drown us and the head it is contained by.
ugh. I love the idea, but it's more a curse/swear at this point. Can you expand it and add a little more poetry? But I do agree, Fuck Bush.
Isn't there something poetic about an overly articulate political rant?
(Otherwise this 'Retaliate' thing may not be such a good idea after all) 191 view(s)
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against the strain so determined
to have its way
Who will grab the cock?
Who will toke the snake
so we can all get out of the car and jerk ourselves off for a fucking change?
('toke the snake' is good, though)
then you started talking about some goddamn wheel and shit, and im sitting there thinking: Man, this guy got some pretty good drugs.. because i don't have a clue what you were trying to do or what message you wanted to express.. bleh..
Good choice, retaliation isnt a good idea, bitching turns me into a demon and i really start shooting rockets at your work.
and about toke the snake, i know.. that was a fucking stroke of genius i had when i needed to fit my mini-parody into your rhyme and form, i succeeded in keeping it focused on a funny rant about masturbation.. im actually quite proud of myself.. ;)
Braking is easy, bilging is dirty business.
Since when is ignorant fundamentalist nepotism the hallmark of a solid education? (Blair is at least articulate). Our president wouldn't know Dido from a dildo if she rammed her fist up his ass.