poemranker ::ILLusion in Falsity by Sugar Victim

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Free verse № 51046

ILLusion in Falsity

by Sugar Victim

Member since 2003 · Posted 1 Jun 2003 · 4 comments

She doesn't understand why It seems an endless pattern going from guy to guy They're great,they love her but not too long Then theres some exuse like this is all so wrong Maybe it's her She just has bad luck The guys she loves are always worthless fucks And you'd think there'd be something to keep it in check besides a good lay and a kiss on the neck So she sets herself up for those in a glass case fiddles with the lock and goes for the chase whos to blame? It's really quite clear the one holding her heart and swallowing her fear

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mean 6.00 weighted 5.12 rank 5855 views 127 View voting details →

3 votes so far. Yours would make 4.3 votes so far

4 comments

[n/a] horus8 1-Jun-03/4:10 PM Reply
excuses, notice the c.
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 2-Jun-03/2:56 AM Reply
You claim it's an endless pattern that she goes from guy to guy. But so far she's only been with a finite number of guys. There are infinitely many incompatible infinite patterns compatible with that finite past.

For example, you think her history of sleeping with worthless guys again and again indicates a pattern called 'bedhopping'. However, it equally well indicates a pattern called 'quedhopping', defined as: sleeping with worthless guys up to and including 2nd June 2003, and physically transmuting into a sentient lichen thereafter. Hence, nothing about her past history determines that she's bedhopping rather than quedhopping.

I think you have more important things to worry about concerning your friend. You'd better go and check she's not already started the transmutation.
[n/a] deleted user 20-Aug-03/12:45 PM Reply
Why does she go around sleeping with all those guys? Does she really know their intentions? Does she understand every bing about bem?
[8] boldsilence 25-Jun-04/6:27 PM Reply
I like this. It's harsh and blunt, but I like that it's straight-forward. The rhymes don't really distract the reader eithre, especially at the end. At the beginning, they were kind of shoddy, but it's okay, because the poem was good. I really enjoyed this. I hope to see another one like it...

-Nichole-

P.S. - I'd appreciate it if you'd take a look at one of my poems too.