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Aries, the God of war (Haiku) by Shardik Ram horns crash, hoving.
Whet stones sharply grind, census.
Mars in retrograde.
Up the ladder:
Die
Down the ladder:
I Dig a Ponytail by Doris & Oats
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 3.86
Posted: March 6, 2003 12:12 PM PST; Last modified: March 6, 2003 3:29 PM PSTWeighted score: 3.86 Overall Rank: 13463 Comments:
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<~> @ 167.206.181.179
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6-Mar-03/12:19 PM
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Reply
ewe. y the comma?
Only mistake here is 'wet' should be 'whet' I think. Otherwise very good indeed, but I would personally like a stronger image built. Still, a nice haiku. 8
How about now?
better. too many throw-away words for a haiku, though:
ram horns crash, ____ ____ whet stones sharply grind ____ ____ Mars in retrograde. get on it son!!!
Ram horns crash, hoving
Whet stones sharply grind, census Mars in retrograde.
yes.
Ok it rocks - 9/10
Tastes great-more filling!!
Hoving?
No entry found for hoving. 4 suggestions found: loving moving roving homing shoving? you've masked the meaning too much, i think.
it's a hoofed spin i invented off of heaving. a mixed word between hovering, hove, hoof, and heaved. past and past part of heave, but now in the present, to be heaving in an uncertain state, a hybrid word. one word out of twelve? i hardly call that masking now mr. foster. i believe it set's up the fear of war when going into it's cousin word upon the page, census.
it would be-HOOVE mr foster to familiarize himself with your oeuvre, as posted on this site (see: plains of africa) as well as the 3rd deinition of the poet's perk:
coin * age n. 1. The right or process of making coins. 2. - Metal currency. - A system of metal currency. 3. - A new word or phrase. - The invention of new words.
hooving rams crash horns
Holy crap, this is bloody awesome. I have a pair of fairly real-looking ram horns I wear from time to time.
dosnt take a genius to say its shit
lol. exactly. It sure doesn't take a genius, take a look at you.
good thing mars isnt retro anymore :D
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