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Too Nearly Remembered (Other) by AtalantaPendragonne
Closing my eyes I almost see you Just the ghost of the shape of your face Just someone I thought I knew I say it again but can't make it true Yesterday is the farthest place Closing my eyes I almost see you What were those things we used to do? Just once there might be, instead of empty space, Just someone I thought I knew A day's just something to get through. Are memories something you can replace? Closing my eyes I almost see you If there had been some sign, some clue Was there a waver in your embrace? Just someone I thought I knew Why should doubts return anew? I will not live at yesterday's pace Closing my eyes I almost see you Is that my choice; forget or rue? I can only deny what I cannot erase Closing my eyes I almost see you Just someone I thought I knew

Up the ladder: To Find the Words
Down the ladder: The 11th hour

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 3.25
Weighted score: 4.7913947
Overall Rank: 11224
Posted: February 27, 2003 11:23 AM PST; Last modified: February 27, 2003 11:23 AM PST
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Comments:
[0] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 27-Feb-03/2:12 PM | Reply
That was pleasent, for an 'other'. It must be terribly awkward to try so hard only to be ignored consistantly. nice vilanelle. The rhyme scheme was almost as complex as the story, or a haircut.
[0] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 27-Feb-03/2:16 PM | Reply
"waver" = waiver, must be tr and not settle tsk. what war? this piece is barely a seven, and i'm in a good mood. What a waste of time...see... settle would not make an error like that, that's where you blew your cover. Both of your edges are boring and dull period anyway just giving you a heads up sycophants.
[n/a] AtalantaPendragonne @ 66.68.17.117 > horus8 | 27-Feb-03/8:35 PM | Reply
Perhaps you need to go to Dictionary.com and look up "waver" and "waiver"?
[0] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 > AtalantaPendragonne | 27-Feb-03/8:51 PM | Reply
Perhaps you need to choke to death on pink champagne and give yourself a waiver back onto the little yellow bus Attie?
[8] <~> @ 64.252.17.3 | 18-Aug-03/6:46 PM | Reply
nice job. the word "nearly" in the title bothers me, though.
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